The Hangover || Phil Wenneck

6. Ever seen a baby do that?

We stood in the elevator in silence, trying to think what happened the night before. Alan and Stu were leaning on both sides of the elevator and I was standing next to Phil, rubbing my throbbing head, while he looked down.

"Why can't we remember a goddamn thing from last night?" Stu asked, as Phil lifted his head and crossed his arms.

"Because we obviously had a great fucking time." Phil responded as the elevator bell rang, causing me to wince at the sound.
"Why don't you just stop worrying for one minute. Be proud of yourself." Phil encouraged, as the doors opened to reveal an old lady who walked in, smiling at the baby.

"Oh, how cute! What's his name?" The little old lady asked us. After no one responded for a moment, Phil piped up. "Ben."
"Carlos." Alan corrected as the old woman gave me a confused look, forcing me to come up with an excuse on the spot. "Carlos?" Phil asked as the doors shut.

"Ben-Carlos! His uncle here just prefers to call him Carlos.." I made up, letting out an awkward chuckle.
"Aw, are you his mother?" She asked me. God, she's nosey.

"Um, actually-" I was about to come up with a lie, but before I could, Phil interrupted by putting his arm around my shoulder.
"Yep! We're the parents." He played along, leaning down to kiss the side of my head, as I suppressed the dying urge to cringe and just smiled at the old lady who made a look of awe at me and Phil.

"Seriously? We're the parents?" I rolled my eyes, as the four of us walked out of the elevator, away from the old lady.
"Relax, she doesn't know us." He smirked, as we walked out to the pool.

***

"Hey, Phil, Eve, look." Alan told us, and I looked up from my waffles and Phil looked down from his drink to see what he was doing. He was moving the baby's arm to make it look like the kid was jerking off, while Alan laughed.

"He's jacking his little wenis." Alan joked, as Phil let out a small laugh, and I just rolled my eyes at the immaturity, going back to eating my waffles.
"Pull yourself together, man." Phil told him, through chuckles.

"Not at the table, Carlos!" Alan pretended to scold the baby, which earned a snigger from me. Okay, it was immature, but it was a little funny.

Stu returned with the small cloth still covering his mouth. "Well?! Did you find him?!" I ask, sitting up, with my knife and fork set down.
"Nuh-uh. I looked everywhere. Gym, casino, front desk. Nobody's seen Doug. He's not here." Stu informed, earning a sigh of hopelessness from me.

"He's fine! He's a grown man!" Phil said, annoyed at everyone stressing, as he picked up a glass of orange juice.
"Seriously, Stu, you gotta calm down. Here, have some juice." He lifted the juice and sat it in front of Stu, which made him throw up on the ground, causing me to gag and look away.

"Fuck sake, Stu! It's gonna end up like that scene from stand by me, where everyone pukes on each other!" I groaned, trying not to think about Stu being sick.

"I can't have juice right now." Stu said, through a strained voice.
"Yeah, I can tell." I shuddered.

"Okay. All right. Let's just track this thing." He said, grabbing a napkin and pulling out a pen, like a typical teacher, as he coughed.
"What's the last thing we remember doing last night?" Phil asked, looking at me and Stu.

"Well, the first thing was we were on the roof... and we were having those shots of Jäger." Alan recalled, as Stu reached and cough, causing me to groan.
"Stu, seriously?!" I huffed, as he rolled his eyes at me.