Decent Dad's

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It takes me so long to stop crying that we completely miss the service at the grave site, insisting that we still go out so I can at the very least give Thomas a hug.

When we approach, he is next to the guy who I assume is his dad talking to the two ladies from before. Thomas spots me and jogs toward us, Edward taps my shoulder, continuing walking over to his dad giving Thomas and I some privacy.

He slams into me full force, we both stumble backwards but his strong arms snake around my waist locking us together. Thomas gently weeps into my shoulder while I rub his back with the little movement my arms can do since I'm currently being crushed in a bear hug.

After a few minutes he pulls back releasing me. "Thank you for coming today." Thomas roughly rubs his eyes, filled with more tears threatening to spill.

"Don't mention it, I'm just glad I can be here for you." My hands move without thinking to push his hair out of his eyes. "Did your mum turn up after all?" I haven't even finished the sentence when his face crumples.

Thomas shakes his head as my heart sinks. "Nope, she is too busy with work. At least dad and my great aunts are here." His chin trembles so I throw my arms around his neck pulling him into a tight hug.

"She will regret it later, the people who matter are here so fuck her." Thanks to my personal experience in the matter, rage is clearly present in my voice.

Thomas snorts right into my neck causing a smile to lift my face. "Yeah, fuck demon Debbie and her shite jewellery company." we both giggle a lightness filling my body I almost forgot could exist.

"Bet you guys can't wait to get back home tomorrow" Thomas's voice has a certain soothing quality that briefly melts away my worries, his strong arms keep me encased in our private bubble.

"Can't wait" I say lazily fully knowing how easy it would be to sleep in these arms.

"How is Alex doing?" Just like that we're brought back to reality with a smack.

Hiding my face in his broad chest I mumble "Alex was doing better, until the police cornered him yesterday. He was so hysterical by the end, I was convinced that they would push back his release but I think they just want rid of him now... Especially after you rinsed out that nurse the other week."

Thomas smiles against my neck before he teases "she had it coming." This unlocks another small bubble of joy from me.

Alex's broken face from this morning swims into my head. "He is trying to hide how bad it is from us but I'm terrified that when we are home where he is not being monitored..." my voice cracks and I don't know when the tears started but judging by how damp Thomas's shirt is I must have been at it for a while.

"I'm terrified that I go to school one day and he kills himself." My sympathy for Alex doubles as I free fall into another panic attack. Thomas is strangely good at calming me back down to the point that it's obvious he has had prior experience with this.

When I finally get to a condition to listen he firmly says, "the second you get home use as much of your shithead dad's money to get Alex the best doctors and psychologists in the country. Make sure he knows how much you need him, it might help give him something to hold on to until then."

Nodding into Thomas' chest he has just echoed my earlier epiphany that I need to tell more people that I love them. "Thank you Thomas, sorry for crying about my crap at your grans funeral" my throat is throbbing, today has been entirely too much for it.

"No need to apologise, gran would probably haunt me for the rest of my days if I didn't ask how Alex was doing." A noise that almost resembles a laugh leaves my mouth. Damn he is good at improving my mood.

"When are you heading back to Surrey?"

Thomas growls "Sunday unfortunately, dad doesn't want me to miss the start of school."

"Oh shit is it next week we start? Fuck, I thought I had a couple more weeks." My anxiety begins to climb, we won't be able to get Alex to a doctor tomorrow afternoon and definitely not on Sunday, I can't leave him on Monday. Not until a professional can analyse him.

I haven't even thought about what I will tell my friends about the accident? Everyone will know, undoubtedly treating me differently. I haven't spoke to any of them since the start of summer for all I know they could hate me by now.

"Your dad might be back and ready to be a parent so don't worry about it right now." Yeah, he is right dad could be home waiting for us, ready to try to piece our family back together.

Edwards rage filled appearance the other day lingers with me casting immediate doubt that dad ever plans to return to us, but I choose not to voice this concern aloud.

"Are you two ready to go to the wake? My in-law's scones are incredible" I untangle from Thomas, turning to his dad. For an older guy he is absolutely gorgeous, he has the same glistening sea blue eyes of his son and if this is what Thomas will look like in twenty years I'm envious of whoever he marries.

"Sorry my son is in hospital so we probably shouldn't leave him alone for too long." Edward pipes up, his usual jolly tone seems to be returning, it's yet another thing I hadn't noticed that I missed until now.

"Oh, right" he shoots Thomas a questioning look, "well we really appreciate you both coming today, I hope your son gets better soon." The men give each other strong handshakes, Thomas gives me a tight hug as I try to use his strength to get me through the next few days.

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