Good Luck Anna

New Job

   Alex starts work on Monday, already awake when I come down for breakfast, glaring at his laptop like he wants to throw it across the room. When Alex notices me, he gives up whatever has made him scowl this early in the day opting to tidy away the notes covering half the table, then slinking off to get dressed, without so much as uttering a single word.

   When I head back into the kitchen after getting dressed in my uncomfortable school, I'm instantly attracted to the thudding of Alex's foot. The unusual sight of him in a full suit knocks me off for a moment, getting Alex in a –properly done- tie is almost impossible. He would willingly take dads wrath before company parties to not wear one.

  "You will do great Alex, even if you don't it's your first day, you are allowed to fuck up so don't panic." His gaze meets mine filled with uncertainty.

  The only response I'm given is a couple of swift nods, then he turns away to pour himself more coffee, which will do nothing to help his restless foot but I don't bother to tell him knowing full well that if Alex doesn't drink it, he will probably pass out before they even make it to the office.

  They both collect me from school that night, Alex is zoned out in the backseat so I slip into the front next to Edward. Becca is going to be pissed that she isn't getting a lift home with us tonight.

   She disappeared with one of the rugby guys at lunch and didn't return for the rest of our classes. I did get a delightful "still alive" text from her an hour ago after I'd rapid messaged her through the last two classes, almost getting my phone confiscated in the process.

  I love Becca like a sister but she doesn't take school remotely serious enough, considering the outrageous amount of money our parents pay for it.

  We get caught in typical London traffic which triggers Alex's anxious leg bouncing. Ten minutes with barely any forward movement later, his face is hidden beneath his hands.

  Reaching back to give his knee a reassuring squeeze, the second I make contact he drops a hand from his face to wrap it with mine. Alex clings onto me for dear life until we are successfully back in Edwards driveway.

  Alex vaults himself out of the backseat dragging in gasping breaths, he is so ghostly white I fear he is about to throw up.

  He turns to face Edward stammering out, "can I have Friday afternoons off work?"

   Edward nods, "Yes of course son."

  Alex closes his eyes taking in another shaky breath, "it's OK, I'm OK," he seems like he is saying that mostly for his own benefit than ours. "I will phone Dr. Crawford to set up the Friday appointments she wanted me to take." With trembling hands he slips out his phone, pure terror plastered across his face.

   Edward places a hand on my shoulder guiding me into the house, away from my struggling bother. Everything inside me demands I shake off Edward to be with Alex, but I know he won't be honest if I am anywhere near him.

  Dr. Crawford must have deemed him in need of emergency counselling since Alex spends the next hour sitting at the bottom of the driveway on the phone to her.

  When he finally comes back inside, he only utters a single sentence before excusing himself to bed.

"I'll be better for you. I promise."