Lycoris Radiata

Twenty Five | 𝕿𝖜𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖞 𝕱𝖎𝖛𝖊

Awkward.

Bella flushed after hearing Leah's door slam shut. Once again, her attempt at making another friend had gone up in flames but unlike those earlier times, this time felt more embarrassing than the rest. Making friends should come easy to her by now; she should have found those girls she could confide almost everything with, but she was still alone and confused. Maybe it was the new girl syndrome still working through her. She made a few friends in Forks, but it took time to get to know the people she wanted to spend time with. She wanted to be on good terms with everyone. Rosalie, Alice, Esme, Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett for she would soon become a part of this family, but they're all so different from each other. So different to the point she's surprised they're a coven to begin with for she was positive they all had their differences that clashed with one another.

Edward himself was so different from his coven mates that she often wondered if they were together for convivence. If they stayed in a little group because they would be lonely if they split. That they wouldn't make it on their own in the immortal lives they hadn't chosen to begin with. And when she joins, she'll be just as different. Like night and day compared to the others for she wanted this life. She wanted immortality, long-lasting beauty, riches, everything. She wanted it all and those thoughts made her feel all the lonelier...she wanted this, but they didn't. They valued human life; she knew they did for they tried retaining as much of their humanity as possible through this weird coven tradition of working jobs and attending school like they weren't trapped in their own bodies for God only knows how long.

She saw no value in this life. It was too easy to get and just as easy to lose and she didn't want that for herself. She wanted to live, without fear of when her eyes may close and never open again. It wasn't appealing in the slightest and she didn't know what the Cullens found so great about it, besides them missing their own humanity. It invoked all types of emotions out of her. Anger, humiliation, and those were just a few to start off with as she remembers all the times she'd been brushed off whenever she asked to get to know them better...that's why she tried with Leah. Leah seemed to have it all despite the little fight she's having with her family. She's got a vampire boyfriend, and a baby, plus Bella bet she was getting along with the Cullens more than she let on...humiliating enough she felt beneath the girl that had less support in life than she did now.

What made Leah so special? Was it because this Kurtis guy was new and they wanted to make him comfortable fast by allowing him to have what he wanted, or was it because Leah was simply different? She seemed so reserved at first. A nicer version of Rosalie for sure plus an easy-going version of Alice. She was motherly like Esme, and was caring like Carlisle, she didn't know about the other two males in the house for she barely interacted with them without their mates involved, but she was sure she related to them more than anything...especially Jasper. She couldn't be alone when Jasper was around, but since Leah was living with them then that must mean he's fine around her. She didn't think that was fair, Edward promised her that they would love her and for the longest she believed it. She believed Edward about his family coming around to like her and the decisions she had made about her life...she believed still.

"Isabella? What a delightful surprise." Esme, smiling with a face full of sugar greeted Bella warmly as she dropped a huge box onto the ground with an obnoxious thwomp. It made Bella flinch, her face turning redder with the knowledge that the vampire had probably heard her sniffling to herself like a child. "Is Edward not here with you? He rarely leaves you alone these days." Esme mentioned nothing though, continuing with whatever she was doing by tearing open a box filled to the brim with articles of fabric from various shades. Curiously, Bella had peeked over Esme's shoulder, just a little with the slight hope that she wouldn't say anything about her nosiness.