Oneshots❤

Number 30.

Today was the day. It was my funeral. I don't get the point of them, all it does is make people cry worse and get to see my dead body? Who even wants to see a corpse.. Well I guess undertakers do but besides the point.

Hi, I'm Paisley, age 18 and I accidentally burnt my apartment room and failed to find my key in time to leave. So here we are today, I'm watching the Undertaker fix my dead ass body to look " perfect " which, I find a tad creepy but okay. It was Friday the 13th of September, funnily enough and my funeral was held today. The worst part about it all? It was 16 days before Nathan's birthday, which was only 2 weeks. I didn't even manage to make it till his birthday.

That's what happens in life, you never know when, how or why your gonna die, but you do. It's horrible really, not knowing when you're gonna die, but what's scarier is doing the thing that causes you death and realising there's no escape. That's what happened to me, I thought I was gonna live and make it out and I could just spend the night elsewhere, but I lied. I lied to myself before I could die, I lied to everyone that day.

We had all planned to go out shopping since it was finally sunny, after having rain for the past couple days it seemed like the perfect day to go out, so we made the arrangement to go out and I'd said I would get there around 1:30pm since I'm usually a bit late and we wasn't meeting until 2:00pm. It was around 1:00pm when the fire started. I never made it. I'd assume my phone was blowing up with messages, all being left on delivered. None of them would of been read for another few hours. Everyone else in the apartment building called the fire brigade and they came busting my door down, that's the last I saw before I officially collapsed into a lifelong coma, never to be woken up again, not even by a fucking kiss.

But, back to the present and enough about my sob story before I died. I quickly went through the wall seeing all the chairs set up, the red tinsel which hung loosely across the walls and as always at funerals, the food and drinks. I went to my fair share of funerals growing up, I was never necessarily trusted home alone and my other siblings had to go so it meant I had to go. They usually hung up tinsel of the corpses favourite colour, in respect, they sometimes would tie their favourite colour bows to the back of chairs as well. That's what they did to my funeral as well, I hated the atmosphere within this room, it was secluded, eerie and overall had a sense of loneliness that hung over the room.

What makes me laugh is the fact I wonder how many people would actually show up. I know some friends would and maybe my main family but I wonder if any distant family members would. I'm not surprised if they're out celebrating instead, I usually caused havoc as a kid, messing around, pushing things off the table, misplacing personal items for the fun of it, stealing shit for no reason, it was all fun and games until I got screamed at constantly by my aunts, cousins and even my mother sometimes. My mum, yes I have two, would be the one to comfort me instead and just tell me " Honey, you need to behave okay? Just play with ur teddy and try not mess about yeah? " stuff like that, but what could you really do, I didn't have a fully developed brain, I had no sense of how much stress I was causing them.

But, i started hearing murmurs of people so I went back into the foyer area and i noticed pretty much all of my friends and my siblings, minus cam since he's still a bit young, I'd assume they got him to stay with an aunt of mine. I looked at everyone, their cheeks were stained with tears, some having the expression of wanting to cry but refused and they all wore black with little hints of red. If I could cry, I would be sobbing. But I'm invisible and dead so that's not possible. How I wish I could give every single person here a hug and tell them how much I loved them.

I never wrote a single note to anyone explaining how if I died today I would miss you all and that even in spirit I would look over every single one of them. Never. I only spoke to Lara, Alicia (who's nathans sister), Lix, Layla, Cam and Nathan about them topics, but it was rarely. I told each of them everytime I saw them or every morning over message how much I loved them and cared for them and that I'd always be there even if one day I randomly disappeared.

Now, I don't know what to say. Seeing everyone upset, every single person having at least something sweet to say about me, having to make a joke to stop themselves from crying worse, it was horrible. I hated this. Why did I have to die of all things? Why couldn't I of lived just that 2 weeks or so more? Why couldn't I of been alive to say one last happy birthday to him. Nathan was all I thought about for a few moments, the last time I messaged him was 11:43am about the plans we made and if he wanted to quickly get coffee beforehand, both of us planning to leave that tad bit earlier so we could. That never fucking happened. The only thing I felt was guilt, pain and like I wanted to cry. But I couldn't. I'm a ghost after all, they can't have physical emotion we're just spirits, we can't have feelings like humans do, it's impossible, right?

Whatever, I don't even know why I'm talking to myself but clearly the feelings part was a lie as I felt like I could breakdown crying and that I wanted to atleast say " I love you all " once more. Just once. But that wouldn't happen, I'm just a soulless, lifeless thing that forever gets to witness my family and friends in pain for the rest of eternity. I hated it but what could I do. One thing repeatedly went through my mind this entire time,

Why was it my funeral.

Word count: 1.1k (1113 words specific)