The Way I Loved You

96.

Simone Co

11:10 pm
Simone, gising ka pa?

11:11 pm
Pwede ba kitang puntahan? Hindi ko alam address ng bago mong unit.

11:12 pm
Ethan, gabi na. Mapano ka pa sa daan. Tsaka para saan ba?

11:13 pm
Mag-usap tayo, please?

11:14 pm
Bukas na lang. Importante ba?

11:15 pm
Oo, importante sa kin 'to.

11:16 pm
Dito ko na lang sasabihin.

11:17 pm
Ano ba 'yon, Ethan?

11:18 pm
I think I know why you broke up with me.

11:19 pm
I'm sorry.

11:20 pm
Huh? Bakit ka nag-so-sorry? I left you. I broke up with you.

11:21 pm
I'm sorry. I'm sorry kung naramdaman mo na problema mo lang ang nakita ko sa'yo. Kung ipinaramdam ko sa'yo na gusto kitang isalba sa mga pinagdaanan mo noon.

11:22 pm
Gusto ko lang malaman mo na hindi ko ginawa ang mga ginawa ko noon para isalba ka. Ginawa ko 'yon kasi kaya ko, at hindi mo ako naubos do'n.

11:23 pm
It's not that simple, Ethan. 🙂

11:25 pm
Alam mo kung bakit kita iniwan? Dahil ayaw ko na mawala ang ikaw na minahal ko. Dahil ayoko na kaya mong ibigay sa akin ang lahat, kapalit ang sarili mo. Ethan, I appreciate everything that you've done for me. For my family. Pero kung itinuloy ba natin, sa tingin mo may matitira pa sa'yo?

11:27 pm
I was at my worst when you loved me. Gipit sa pera. May trabaho na, nag-a-aral pa, raketera pa sa gabi. Hindi ko ikinakahiya lahat ng pinagdaanan ko dahil 'yon ang bumuo sa akin. Pero kung 'yon ang uubos sa'yo? Hindi ko matatanggap.

11:28 pm
Hindi ako nagbigay para maubos, nagbigay ako kasi 'yon ang mayro'n ako noon.

11:30 pm
Alam mo 'yong quote? May nagbigay ng $10 tapos may nagbigay ng $20. Ako 'yong $20. I may have given more if you'll compare both denomination but it doesn't mean that I gave more. I gave that because I'm capable. Kasi may sobra ako.

11:31 pm
'Yung nagbigay ng $10? Ikaw. Nagbigay ka kahit 'yon na lang ang mayro'n ka.

11:33 pm
I didn't save you, I never did in the first place. Lahat ng ginawa ko para sa'yo, those things weren't heroic. I loved you the way I know how. I stayed. I stood by you. Pero hindi kita iniligtas. Hindi ko ibinigay sa'yo lahat kapalit ang sarili ko.

11:35 pm
Hindi ako ang nagtrabaho sa umaga, hindi ako ang nagpuyat para sa mga raket mo. Okay, maybe in a few instances pero ikaw pa rin ang dumiskarte. Hindi ako ang nag-aral para sa'yo. Hindi ako ang nagbaba ng pride para manghiram ng pera. Hindi ako ang nagpatuloy ng pangarap mo. Ikaw 'yan. Ikaw lahat 'yan.

11:37 pm
And I will never take credit, not even a part of it, to who you are right now. You're this Simone because you fought for it. You staked your claim. Kasi gano'n ka 'di ba? Kasi hindi ka naman talaga spoiled katulad ng sinabi mo sa akin noon. Hindi mo nakuha ang mga gusto mo dahil nando'n pa ang papa mo, nakuha mo 'yon kasi pinaghirapan mo.

11:38 pm
Nakita ko lahat 'to, hindi lang ang mga problema mo. Kaya kita mahal. Because even when you think that you were at your worst, I still saw you at your best. Because you are.

11:39 pm
And I don't deserve that, Ethan! I broke up with you when you passed the bar and I didn't kasi sumabog na ako. Napagod ako sa mga pinagdadanan ko and you didn't deserve that from me! Ang sama kong tao kasi dapat masaya 'yong araw na 'yon para sa'yo pero sinaktan kita dahil naubos ako.

11:40 pm
You organized a party for me when I passed the bar, kahit nakipag-break ka na sa akin. You think I won't find out? Sinabi ni Mommy.

11:41 pm
You broke up with me dahil takot kang hihilahin mo ako pababa kasama mo. But do you think that Simone would stay in the bottom? No, I know you'll find a way. Alam kong ilalaban mo, and you did.

11:42 pm
Sana lang binigyan mo ako ng pagkakataon pumili noon.

11:43 pm
Because you're so scared of weighing me down but you know what scared me? Getting to the top without you, because I wanted that with you. Alam kong kaya natin.

11:45 pm
Pero iniwan mo ako.

11:46 pm
My struggles before weren't yours to carry. I can't make you go through that for me, Ethan.

11:47 pm
I never tried to own your struggles, I just wanted to be there for you.

11:48 pm
But you think you're saving me, right? Kasi ang totoo, ikaw ang may gusto n'yan.

11:49 pm
I never wanted to be saved, Simone. But you didn't give me a choice.

11:50 pm
Now I'm laying all the evidence I can give you, Simone.

11:51 pm
You can either choose to prosecute me with you this time or acquit me and let me go.

11:52 pm
Because before I took the lawyer's oath and promised my allegiance to the State, I was yours first.

11:53 pm
I promised my allegiance to you. My love. My support.

11:54 pm
And I impose upon myself these voluntary obligations without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion.

11:55 pm
So help me, because I'm still so in love with you even after all these years, and beyond reasonable doubt.