Emily fell first, JJ fell harder
jj and emily are sophomores in college and their room selections got messed up. emily wanted to room with Elle while jj wanted to room penelope. instead they have to live with each other. will one night together tur...
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Next day JJ's POV
I spent the morning hunched over the toilet puking my brains out. I don't remember how I got home all I know is I woke up on my bedroom floor passed out. Emily had derek tell me that she's going to come over later because she wants to talk, not argue. Just talk.
I'm letting her come over because her presence brings me comfort. She's the only person who can help me right now.
I've been rotting my day away in bed and eating Cheetos. Emily used to buy me Cheetos all the time. Hm.
I looked at the soccer group chat and one of the girls had sent a picture of Emily and I kissing last night.
Sophia 1 Attachment: 1 Image JJ what happened to standing on business😫
The rest of the girls responded in shock and told me that I need to do better, that I have to move on... some were nice and said that it happens but I shouldn't do it again. Whatever.
I respond back:
lol
I glance at the time and it's 7. Meaning emily will be here any minute. I throw on an oversized hoodie and sweatpants and put my hair into a messy bun.
I get a notification on our doorbell app that someone's here and I run downstairs to open the door. Allison and Jaylin had already opened the door. They don't say anything but they just give me that look and walk away.
"Come in." I say and I lead her to the 2nd living room where we could talk in peace.
"What did you want to talk about?" I ask, sitting down and she sits on the sofa across from me. "I miss you." She says. "I miss you too." I say.
"JJ please I promise it'll never happen again. I'll never hurt you like that again. I'll do anything for you to take me back please. I told you so long ago that I wouldn't let you go without putting up a fight. Please. I'm fighting for us. I'll do anything to regain your trust. I need you." She starts to cry.
"I don't... I don't know what to say." I say. "Say you'll take me back. Please." "That's not fair emily." "I know. I'm sorry. I don't like life without you in it. It's my fault. I disrespected you, I embarrased you and I disrespected your family. The fact that I wasn't thinking isn't a valid excuse. There's no excuse for what I did. I made a mistake and I want to fix it. I don't want to hurt you."
"You already hurt me." A tear falls. "I'm sorry."
"Have you talked to Elle?" I ask and she hesitates. I laughed.
"Yes. I have. She asked me how I was doing and I told her I didn't want to see her. She got a little flirty and I walked away. That's all. That's the truth." She states.
"How do I know you're not lying." I sigh. "I swear I'm not. That's all that happened. I know you don't trust me and I get it. Just give me another chance please."
"Emily every time I look at you I feel so many emotions. The main one being sadness. You hurt me so bad and did it in the most disrespectful way possible. I don't know if I can forgive you for that. I want to forgive you. I keep telling myself that it's not a big deal and that I'm overreacting and that I should just take you back because I miss you but then I would be disrespecting myself. You told me that I have to be there for myself. Here I am, being here for myself. You made a mistake. Learn from it and do better for the next girl." I break down.
"I don't want there to be a next girl JJ I want you. I love you." She kneels down in front of me and grabs my hands, holding them. Both of our promise rings were still on.
"This ring means something. I promise you I'll change. I promise I'll do better. I love you. Please I'm not giving up on us." "You gave up on us the second you put your lips on another woman."
"JJ do you still love me?" She places her hands on my cheeks. "I don't want to love you anymore. It hurts so bad to love you," I admit. "I loved you unconditionally. And you made me look like an idiot for loving you."
"Loved? Past tense." She asks. Fuck.
"I don't have unconditional love for you anymore. You know I feel all emotions very deeply. It's either all or nothing. And the fact that I can't tell if I love you or not anymore... I second guess myself when I tell my friends that I love them. I'm scared to love anyone close to me and I've never been like this. I have nothing left to give you Emily. You've taken all of me." I cry.
She doesn't say anything. She pulls me closer to her and we both look in each other's glassy, tear filled eyes. She sits down on the couch next to me and suddenly her lips were on mine. And I didn't stop her.
