can't be friends

intro - 5

JJ's POV
Same night

Emily plops down on the bed and stares up at the ceiling. "It's scary because I do not remember any of it. I only remember bits and pieces." She says. "You don't remember who you were talking to before I came up to you?" "No... not at all." She says.

"I'm just so beyond annoyed because why me? And I just made a fool of myself and it's so embarrassing. Everyone views me as so put together and last night, I was everything but that." I notice a tear slip from her eye but she quickly wiped it away.

"Emily..." I say. "Hm?" She looks over at me. "It's not your fault. You didn't ask to be drugged. It's not embarrassing. Unfortunately it could happen to any of us. We're in college. It was completely out of your control and it is not your fault. I promise you." I say.

She stays quiet after that. "What are you thinking?" I ask. "A lot of these old memories are coming back to me. I moved around a lot as a kid and I never really put down roots anywhere. I finally was able to do that when I got to college last year and now I feel like I'm messing it up. Like im disappointing myself."

"Can I tell you something?" I say, grabbing the brownies and sitting down next to her legs on her bed. "Yeah." She says. "When I was 11... my older sister died. She took her life after struggling with depression. I didn't let myself be happy for the longest time. I thought I had no right to enjoy my life if she couldn't enjoy hers, and I had to keep my parents together. I begged and I prayed that when I grew up, and got out of that town, that I would be allowed to grieve. The point of all of this is... my younger self would be so absolutely proud of me if she saw the person that I am today. Living my life as best as I can. And that goes for you too. You are a human, things out of your control are bound to happen Em. You are here today and younger you would be beyond proud of you and happy if she saw you today. She would be relieved that you've finally been able to put down roots somewhere. And if it makes you feel better, even though we don't even know each other that well... I'm proud of you and I'm always here for you." I say.

Tears start to flow out of her eyes. "Wow I'm a mess I'm sorry." She cries. "It's okay," I laugh. "Here have a brownie." I joke and pass her one.

She sits up and grabs the brownie and I lean my head on her shoulder sympathetically. "You're a good friend you know that? I really appreciate you a lot." She says. "I appreciate you too." I smile.

"And I'm sorry about your sister. I didn't know that." She says. "I don't talk about it really." I say. "Well im here if you ever want to talk about it." She says. "Thank you emily."

After a moment I lift my head up and we both look at each other. Our faces being so close to one another. It wasn't uncomfortable at all... it was actually quite comforting. She smiles and then quickly looks away and I get up and grab the remote. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something?" I ask. "Yeah what we watching?" She says. "Your pick." I throw her the remote, "I don't like picking it gives me too much anxiety." She jokes. "Well same with me! So you pick!" I laugh. "Fine."

I turn off the lights and hop in my bed as we watch 5 feet apart. We joked, laughed, and mainly cried until we both fell asleep.

I can tell she's going to be a very important person in my life. I already feel comfortable with her and we just met a week ago.