The Son and the Sparrow

Chapter Twelve(v3)

Chapter Twelve

Leon had his hands on the steering wheel, looking straight ahead and driving to his destination. They were far from the city now, even the quiet suburbs, and rolling golden acres of corn surrounded them. It brought on a soothing sort of feeling, seeing the high stalks wave in the soft wind. Leon couldn't tell if his thoughts were moving so fast he couldn't catch them or if he simply had no thoughts at all. He didn't mind. Leon hummed a little tune quietly, to make up for the lack of radio in the car. About a half an hour ago he couldn't find anything that suited him and turned it off. Leon's hands were grasping the wheel tightly, but his eyes were distant, with a little smile tucked under. Leon could sense Daniel next to him. As Leon drove, he was fidgeting more and more. He rubbed his hands against his pants and looked around almost in alarm. He looked like a trapped animal, trying to find a way out.

"Leon-" Daniel squeaked suddenly, sounding afraid and unable to hold back any longer.

"No." Leon interrupted him. He wanted the silence to remain.

"But-but Leon-"

"No." Leon repeated.

Daniel looked down at his hands with a distressed expression. Leon wondered what he was thinking. He seemed extremely frightened by the situation. He was always a bit of a coward but this seemed abnormal for even him. Leon suddenly regretted snapping at Daniel like that. He just knew that if he thought too much about what he was doing he'd find a way to run from it. And he couldn't let himself do that. Not after all this. He couldn't just forget. He couldn't let himself forget.

"Le-"

"No!" Leon barked.

"What was your son like?" Daniel asked abruptly, still staring at his hands.

Leon's mouth dropped open. "What?"

Daniel looked up with a penetrating gaze. "Your son. What was he like?"

Leon hadn't been expecting that kind of question. He fumbled over the answer for some reason, though he thought about his son almost constantly. "Well..." he his horror, nothing came to mind. He imagined his son's face, and smiled. He started simply. "Clay had Haley's hair. My eyes. Smooth skin." He smiled. "Tiny hands." He could almost feel those hands in his own, his lips on Clay's soft cheek. He struggled to keep his voice from choking up. "He almost seven. He was like any kid I guess. He loved to go places, do fun things, laugh, play." Leon paused. "The universe fascinated him, even though he was young. I remember he would lie on the grass in the backyard and just stare up at the sky. He loved learning about space and the solar system. Then, when it was his bedtime, I would go outside and join him. He would tell me the names of certain constellations, and I would listen to him, wondering how he knew so much about it at such a young age. I'm pretty sure he knew more than I did." Leon chuckled weakly. "I..." his vocal chords constricted, making it difficult for him to speak. He was very close to breaking, yet he couldn't seem to stop. "I always thought that he was going to be an astronaut or something like that. I had never seen a kid with that much passion for space, with that much spark. I'd look into his eyes, widened with awe, and I'd think to myself, 'this is my son'. And it would make me happy, just thinking about that. That I created someone so special. Someone so wonderful and caring and smart. And Hhe loved us, Haley and me. Of course, he had his rough days, and would throw tantrums, but...I would do anything to even only have all the bad times. Because even those were better than nothing at all."

"Wow Leon. I've never seen you like this before."

Leon smiled in embarrassment. Clay had altered him somehow in those years he was on Earth. He created a loving father out of the leader of a gang. Out of a murderer. And now that Clay was gone...what remained? Who was Leon now, this broken man, hell-bent on resurrecting his dead son? Leon blocked himself from asking the obvious question, the one that asked why he was doing this. The part of him that was starting to doubt what he saw.