Love and Football (BWWM Interracial Love Story)

Chapter 47 Stay or Go

"Um..I'm saving myself for marriage"

Kendra watched as Jason's smile slowly faded away. She watched as his Adam's apple bobbed up and down.

What was he thinking?

He said it wasn't about sex.

He said he wanted her for who she was.
She knew it was a lot to ask, but it was only fair to let him know about her decision to remain abstinent until marriage. Now. At this point in their relationship. That way, he could decide if this was something he could accept... or reject. She owed him that no matter how much his response could possibly hurt her.

Kendra stared at her lap and began fidgeting with her fingers. "I know it may sound stupid or seem old-fashioned but it's something I want to commit to for myself. I believe soul ties are created when you have sex with someone.I only want to do that with my future husband, someone who is committed to spending the rest of their life with me..."

Her anxiety was getting the best of her so much that she continued to ramble on to fill the silence. Jason sat there and listened. She had no idea what he was thinking.

"...I think you should know now before we get too deep, it's only right..... I understand if you don't want to be with me."

Kendra felt the lump in her throat, forming and tears fighting their way to the surface, but she tried her hardest to suppress them. She didn't want her tears to influence Jason's decision. She didn't want him feeling sorry for her or feeling obligated to stay out of pity. She wanted the decision to be fully his own.

Jason took a silent, deep breath.

Then he spoke.

"Kendra...I like you a lot....I always talk about us being honest and real with each other. So I'm not gonna lie and tell you that I'm cool with it...."

Jason sighed.

"I have thoughts about you....but like I told you earlier, this is not about sex. I'm truly into you. I don't think I've ever felt this way about a girl before...."

Kendra continued to listen, her heart now pounding, wondering where he was going with this. He looked conflicted.

".....So if you wanna save yourself for marriage, I will respect that."

After a few moments of silence, Kendra spoke, "So..."

Jason offered her the palm of his hand. Kendra looked down at it for a moment before she placed her hand in his. Jason interlaced their fingers. She stared at their hands and looked back into his eyes.

"So...I'm not going anywhere. I'm here to stay. "

The tears and the lump in her throat she was trying desperately to suppress got the best of her, and Kendra shed a tear.

"You don't have to if you don't want to, Jason."

"I want to Kendra. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. "

She sniffled. "Thank you..thank you for understanding."

"You're welcome."

Jason kissed the back of her hand that he was still holding, causing her to smile.

"So um..have you lost your virginity?" Kendra asked.

Jason looked down at his lap for a brief second before looking back into her eyes.

"No"

"...So you're a virgin?"

"Yea"

He looked like he was ashamed.

"Are you ashamed of that?"

"Nah...it's just that when you're a guy, there's this expectation that you shouldn't be.Girls want you to be experienced. Other guys clown you if they know you're one...I got this cousin...he talks about girls non-stop and who he's tryna sleep with next and shit all the time, and it just gets annoying. He's always tryna give me advice I never ask for. But I haven't told anybody except you....It's not their business anyway."

Kendra contemplated what he said.

"Well, thank you for telling me."

"If anybody should know, it should be you, right?"

She nodded. "You should be proud of yourself, though. You're strong enough to have your own mind and not be influenced by everybody else.Trust me, I know it's a lot of pressure for guys to have experience. So many of them brag about their body count." She rolled her eyes.

"Yea, it's stupid."

"But honestly, I didn't think you were a virgin," she admitted.

"Why?" He chuckled.

"Because...I don't know... You're you. "

They both laughed.

" I'm me? What's that supposed to mean?"

She smiled, shrugging her shoulders. "I dont know... you got game..swag..and you fine"

He smirked. "And you fine as hell too, so what does that mean?"

She blushed, shrugging her shoulders again.

" Nah, but for real, I could only have sex with a girl I really care about or love." He admitted, looking down at his hands.

"Awww baby... you're so sweet,"

"I'm your baby?" He smirked, looking back into her eyes.

She giggled. "See, look at you...Yes you are."

"Give me a kiss then"

She leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips against his as they shared a slow, tender kiss.His lips were as soft as they appeared. He slipped his tongue inside and pulled her closer to him, tasting the sweetness of her strawberry lip gloss. Kendra caressed the nape of his neck, feeling the silken strands there. She moaned into his mouth, which did something to him.

Jason broke the kiss.

"We should stop"

"...Ok"

Jason sighed, running his hand over his hair and then rubbing the back of his neck.

".....You said you have thoughts about me. What kind of thoughts?" Kendra wondered.

Jason licked his lips before his eyes met hers. "Now is not a good time for me to tell you that....just know they're not PG."

Kendra got the hint and realized he was probably aroused, and talking about such thoughts would make it even harder for him. Pun intended.

After they collected themselves and cleared the air, Jason drove her home.By the time she reached home it 7 o'clock at night.

After they did homework, ate dinner, and got ready for bed, they called each other on facetime, talking and laughing, until they both fell asleep.

Kendra's mom, Miriam, came to her room to say good night. When she entered the room, she saw her daughter fast asleep with the phone on her pillow. Miriam smiled to herself and put the phone on the charger.

She could see the signs.

Her daughter was in love.