Love and Football (BWWM Interracial Love Story)

Chapter 73 Breaking the Cycle

Jason's P.O.V

I drove aimlessly, having no clue where the fuck I was going. I thought about going to see Kendra, but I couldn't let her see me like this. Plus I don't wanna deal with the lectures and the questions from her. She's always asking me what's wrong. She's always studying me. I can't deal with that shit today. I can't go to my friends. Reese and David have problems of their own. They've already came to my rescue twice. Uncle Brant crossed my mind but I won't give Colton the pleasure of seeing me like this. I am alone. Maybe that's what I need...and deserve. Maybe this is what being a man is all about --dealing with shit on your own and not shedding a tear.

My phone began to ring with back to back calls from my mom but I don't feel like talking right now. She made her choice. She let him take control of the situation. Who the fuck does he think he is, getting in my face like that? Then Kendra's face came across my screen. I sighed. I really don't wanna talk to her either. I let the call go to voicemail but then she called again. I decided to answer.

"Hello?" Jason answered, his voice rough around the edges.

"I thought you were gonna call me back," Kendra's soft voice floated through the phone.

"I was," he murmured, gripping the steering wheel tighter. The streetlights seemed to blur together as he drove.

"Are you going to the hospital?" she asked, her voice laced with worry.

"No, I'm not going to the hospital. I wish y'all would stop saying that," Jason snapped, the words coming out harsher than he intended.

"Sorry," Kendra whispered, her voice small.

Fuck. A wave of guilt washed over him. Kendra didn't deserve that.

He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you."

"It's okay," she said softly. "You've been through a lot." Her voice was full of understanding that only made him feel worse.

He gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. Silence stretched between them, thick with unspoken tensions.

"Jason," Kendra started again, her voice hesitant, "I'm just worried about you. You've been in three fights in a matter of a few weeks."

'I know. People should stop fuckin' with me,' he thought.

"Don't you see that that's not normal? You need to learn to walk away," she pleaded.

Her words were like a match to gasoline. "So you want me to stand by while that piece of shit calls you out your name and undresses you with his eyes and makes sexual comments about you?" he spat, his voice rising.

"No, b–"

"Then what do you want me to do?" he interrupted, his voice sharp.

"You can walk away or just use your words or something," Kendra insisted. "You don't have to fight every battle."

"So I'm supposed to turn the other cheek, huh?" Jason scoffed. It was like she didn't even get it. Kendra sighed.

"That may work for you and everybody else, but not for me. I'm not about to stand there while some lil bitch disrespects you or me."

"I'm not saying it's easy to walk away I–"

"Then what are you saying?" Jason pressed, his frustration mounting.

"Is this really about me," Kendra's voice was barely a whisper, "or is this about your ego?"

"Huh?" Jason furrowed his eyebrows, a prickle of annoyance running through him.