Our Father's Crusade (leverage x Psych) COMPLETED

I Wish I Was Enough

We'd been looking at houses for two weeks. Elliot and I couldn't agree on anything, none of them were right, and if we liked it Shawn found something wrong with it. Or Lassiter would. I was 23 weeks which meant I was nearly at viability so I was nesting hard and you can't nest in a tiny apartment with four people.

Today we were looking at an older house, it was big, near the water. Lassiter seemed to like it but he was being an over protective older brother. Shawn and Juliet have been wandering this one together, and Elliot is looking at the kitchen, he always spent the most time there.

That dream the other night really shook me. Why did I have it? Things were getting better with me and Elliot, he'd started remembering a little, we were honest about it and how it made us feel every time we discussed it. We should be getting better, but yet I had a sex dream about Shawn that ended in him dying. He loves Juliet and she loves him too, I love Elliot, there's just still a lot to work through I guess.

"You okay Carter? You've been off today." Lassiter's voice in my ear was suddenly pulling me from my thoughts.

"I'm okay lassie, just getting anxious about finding a house. You didn't need to come with me." I laughed it off as we wandered down a hallway trying not to get into it. He was the last person that needed to be the recipient of a breakdown.

"Why do you and Spencer insist on calling me that? I'm not a dog." He playful grumbled. "See this is why you needed me, look at that, the door isn't squared."

"Yeah but look at that beautiful original woodwork. Who cares if it's square?" I ran my hand along the door frame smiling at the pocket doors. "Do you know how hard it is to find pocket doors anymore?"

"Okay those are nice I'll give you that. I'm going to go check the foundation." He surrendered waltzing out the back door as I shook my head laughing.

I turned to go back down the hallways to find Elliot standing there smiling. He looked happy which made me hopefully we might of actually found our house.

"I think this might be the one." Elliot muttered smiling as he put an arm around me. "Shawn and Juliet are playing on the swing set outside.  Parker is going to love that."

"8 bedrooms, should be just big enough." I remarked doing the math on my hand.

"I swear we'll never know peace again." He chuckled as we wandered into the kitchen. "I like the kitchen, I like it a lot."

"Are we doing it?" I asked smiling at Elliot as we stood there. The sun was pouring through the windows landing on the hardwood floor. This house was big and open, the kind you raise a family in. It reminds me a lot of the one I grew up in. It's normal, I need normal.

"Guys I love this house!" We heard Shawn yell running through the halls as he blew past us.

"I think we are." Elliot's smile was met with hug as we watched him keep running. After a minute of our laughter and Shawn's running Lassiter came back in.

"Foundation looks good. I'm gonna call my inspector before you put a down payment on it." Lassiter's dedication to our quest was beyond sweet. I never thought I'd like him so much.

"Shawn just told the agent we're buying it so I hope you're as on Board as he is." Juliet walked in smiling as she looked around the kitchen. "I'm so looking forward to dinners here."

"It's close to the beach too, I always liked the idea of living by the beach." I smiled as I rubbed my belly. "I think the girls like it too."

"I'm gonna go get Shawn, I'll let him know we're all on board." Juliet tapped the counter smiling before she turned out the door and shouted after him.