"I look back on the vulnerable girl you took advantage of, I don't recognize her anymore. But I still wish I could go back. Give her a hug. Hold her hand. And tell her 'You are strong enough to leave and you deserve so much more'"James knew this conversation wasn't going to be a good one. Looking at the three boy's faces in front of her all staring at her in confusion and shock...she knew that this was going to turn into a fight.
There was no getting around it.
The boys had been fiercely protective over the girls. Making sure they walked them in the halls, constantly checking in, glaring at anyone who looked at them the wrong way. Their protective nature went up after the bench incident and all the shit that went down in Sang's house. Her mom tying her up in the shower-her dad leaving.
They'd all started to be more vulnerable with one another. James's self-harming tendencies were another cause for tension in the group. James has been trying to be better but sometimes things could be hard.
Now they were all looking right at her. She felt a lump grow in her throat. She didn't know what they wanted to hear, what she needed to say. It was like no words could escape her as she looked at them.
She was desperately hoping they would understand her.
James couldn't even fault the boys for being protective. She felt the same protective nature over them and Sang.
The issue is James wasn't used to people protecting her. Looking after her. Taking care of her.
Not since her dad died.
"What?" Nathan finally asked, "your-"
"It's been too long." James finally stated. She had always dipped in and out of the foster home. Most of the time she could pull it off. Hideaway for a week or two to heal. Often those times she'd stay at the park. This however had been the longest she'd been away. She was afraid of the outcome. Sometimes Beatrice- her foster mother would get extremely upset. "I can't just...not be there."
She kept her voice firm but causal. They had gotten into a bad habit with one another.
"Why the fuck not?" Gabe snapped looking personally offended. "Your foster mom is a bitch."
"Legally it's my home." James held up a hand before any of them could say any more or any less. "I can't just disappear forever. I've played house too long."
She had.
If the guys kicked her out she'd have to get used to that lifestyle all over again.
She let herself get comfortable.
She let all those days she pretended that she had that perfect picket fence life be a reality.
That wasn't James's reality.
And she needed a game plan.
It was awesome that James had a room at Sean's place. A good backup plan is that she could spend the night with the boys. And as much as she wanted to hide away with them forever...she couldn't.
When she turned eighteen she could run away. Until then she needed to suck it up.
Some weekends and days she'd sneak away with the guys but she couldn't keep going how she was.
Truthfully she let it go on longer than she should because she was scared.
James was terrified of that home.
James never liked to admit she was scared but after Beatrice drowned her...after the women destroyed her room...
James liked being somewhere she felt safe.
YOU ARE READING
Ghost Bird The Academy: Jameson Addition.
FanfictionWhat if a second bird was joining Sang and the Academy boys. Sang and James are like night and day. Winter and Summer. Where Sang can be quiet and timid James is bold and energetic. Both seem to grab the boys attention as well as each other. Both ar...