Ghost Bird The Academy: Jameson Addition.

Welcome To Bob's Diner

            "We cannot become what we want by remaining what we are."

The previous day was a mess.

On one hand, James stuck up for herself. She protected herself after many years of lacking self-preservation. So many years of being hurt. James had to protect herself. And as much as she cared for her new friends...She didn't know how far that trust went.

In truth, she wanted to be completely blind to their ways and trust them completely.

But they had secrets.

The academy. The girls didn't know every little detail about it. Hell, they agreed to be shielded from it. But there was a lot they didn't know about the boys. A lot of the boys didn't tell them.

So for them to ask for every single detail of her and Sang's life? It wasn't realistic. They had only known one another for such a short period and sure it was growing every day. James trusted them more than she had anyone in a long time.

Hell, it took her so long to open up to Cecelia. Her heart panged at the thought of the woman. Cecelia took a chance on James. James was rude, mouthy, and hurtful at times, but Cecelia didn't give up on her.

James appreciated that. Without the woman taking the time to care for James she'd be dead. She was so depressed when she met her. She owed her life to Cecelia.

There was so much the others didn't know about James...there was so much the redhead wasn't ready to share. Being through everything she's been through. It's hard not to blame herself. It's hard being open.

She's proud of how honest she's been with them. Opening up about her self-harm, sharing her suicidal tendencies she was trying to get better. Trying to become a better person. To make friends, to start enjoying life, to have crushes.

That didn't mean she was perfect.

It didn't mean she was healed.

There was still so much for her to learn, how to handle situations, how to grow. So sometimes she reverted to old ways. It would be crazy for her not to. Her whole life she's been abused. Her whole life she's been manipulated. As much as her heart yearned to trust the group of people she knew blindly... years of having her reality be the complete opposite kept her from it.

She wanted to be truthful but the pit in her gut, her past abuse, her trauma, none of it just went away because she met a group of people who she's started to care for.

Trauma didn't just heal overnight.

Abuse doesn't just go away. Not when you haven't fully accepted it.

Sean, Owen, and her stayed in the music room talking for a long while. They decided that one of the boys would stay with her when she went back home. Just in case Beatrice did something crazy like tearing apart her room again or anything else.

They wanted to insert a camera but James pushed back on that. She would only be going back to the house to sleep and come in for some dinners. It wasn't like she was spending every minute there.

She agreed to keep her phone on her, red line if she's ever uncertain or if anything happens. The boys also expressed getting her out of that house and into a new one. James insisted she wanted to stay. She wanted to figure out what happened to Cecelia, and she didn't want to start over at another foster home again. The boys tried to press but James pushed back.

"James?" Leo asked making the girl glance over to him. She zoned out for far too long. 

"I feel like I still don't know what to talk about here," James admitted to Leo sitting on the man's couch. She wasn't good at therapy. She didn't know how to open up about her trauma.