The Astronites II: Avast Voyage

Chapter Twenty-Four: The Doggone Days of Barbara Miller

"Here, look now. Just above the tree line."

"I still don't see anything, Adam."

"Don't force it. Try to relax and just look down—"

"OH MY GOD! I SEE IT!"

"Shh! My parents can hear us from the house. How is it?"

"It's so . . . round! I can see its stripes!"

"Stripes?"

"Yeah, stripes! What else could they be?"

"It's Jupiter, Barb. A gas giant planet. It's not a flag. It doesn't have stripes. It has storms that are five times more powerful than a hurricane on Earth."

"Whatever. It has stripes in the same style and color as my mom's old sweater from the eighties. That's close enough."

"Okay, okay. Let me show you something else."

"No! I want to keep looking at my stripes!"

"Don't worry! I'm going to show you another stripe — I mean, gas planet. Just let me adjust the telescope. Hold on . . . okay. Try now."

"I don't see — WOAAAH!"

"Try to keep your voice down!"

"But it's another stripe planet!"

"It has a name, you know."

"AND IT'S GOT A HULA HOOP AROUND IT!"

"Shh — wait, are you seriously comparing Saturn's elaborate ring system to a cheap plastic toy loop?"

"Spin those rings, girl! You don't need no Jupiter!"

"Saturn is a Roman god, Barb, not one of your theater girlfriends."

"Don't you dare insult Satie in front of me! Ignore him, Satie. He's just mad that he can't get the same kind of attention you do from girls."

"Great. This is exactly how I wanted to spend tonight. Listening to you gossip with the planets."

"Should've thought ahead, Adam. Put that big brain of yours to some actual use."

"Yeah, you're right."

"Show me another planet."

"I can't, Barb."

"Why not?"

"They're all below the horizon."

"And who put them there?"

"Umm, I don't know. Maybe the Earth?"

"Too bad. I was really hoping to see Venus."

"Why?"

"Wow, another thing you don't know, Adam. You're really striking out tonight. Venus is the goddess of love, duh."

"I knew that!"

"I don't think so. Why bring me out here if I can't see the planet of love?"

"Umm . . . maybe . . . because with you . . . I'm already on a planet of love. . . . What do you have to say to that, Barb? Hmm?"

"For once, Adam Robinson . . . you actually said the right thing. . . ."

Knock, knock.