While I'm on my way to submit mission reports in the Ark, a message comes from the group chat.
*BlaBla Chat Opened*
Anis: Commander, a package's just arrived for you. It doesn't have the sender's name. We found a legit stamp on it thought, delivered by the post office.
Commander: What's inside?
Rapi: One moment.
Rapi posts the picture of a white box with a heart-shaped and covered by an elegant red ribbon.
Neon: A heart-shaped box. There's chocolate inside.
Commander: ...
Anis: Well well~. Since it's Valentine, someone's decided to step it up.
Rapi: However, there's no name on it and it seems to be genuine chocolate. Commander, should we investigate this?
Anis: Rapi. It's Valentine, somebody is probably too shy to give away their name.
Rapi: Anis, we need to make sure this package doesn't contain potential risks. Commander, your order.
Neon: Talk about potential risks, Rapi, aren't you making something in the kitchen? I see smoke coming out the oven.
Rapi: !!! I have to go!
Commander: What's going on?
Anis: Nothing. Someone is just eager to make the sweetest gift.
Neon: With charred spots for decoration and a burning smell for impression.
Anis: Neon, let's step away from the chat for a moment. Either way, we'll leave the package in your room, Commander. Let's celebrate Valentine when you come back.
Commander: Okay. Thanks, guys.
*Ping!*
A new message comes, not from the group chat.
Syuen: Hey.
Hm? Syuen?
Syuen: Hey! Answer me! Are you reading this?!
Commander: What do you want?
Syuen: You didn't happen to receive a package today, did you?
Commander: A package?
Syuen: You did, right? Tell me that it's at your place!
Commander: Why? Did you send it?
Syuen: Wha....me? ME?! Of course NOT! What's you babbling about?! Are you crazy?! ASfaeun329op8cxhaszdvuiodsad...think you hot?! Think you that good?! You're just useful to me, THAT'S IT!
Commander: What's gotten into you?
Syuen: ARRGGGH! (Inappropriate language detected) (Inappropriate language detected) (Inappropriate language detected) Anyway, send it back.
Commander: Send what back?
Syuen: The package!
At this moment, I connect the dots.
Commander: It's you. You're the sender.
Syuen: I don't know what you're talking about. A useless employee in my company happened to get the wrong address.
Commander: There's only one place called the Outpost and it's not in the Ark.
Syuen: Stop! Just say that you will send it back already!
Commander: Alright. I'll send the heart-shaped chocolate box back to you.
Syuen: !!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You opened it?! YOU REALLY OPENED IT?! ASDAJFDHjsdoaihoh429hcd2sdei Why did you open a package with no name?!
Commander: Because. Receiver: My Name.
Syuen: .............................................
Commander: ...
Syuen: Oh well. What's done is done. Just keep it, I don't need it anymore.
Commander: But isn't this important to you?
Syuen: I've never said that. I've just said I need it back.
Commander: Then I'll send it back to you.
Syuen: Are you-! Are you dumb?! I said I don't need it anymore since you opened it. Just take it!
Commander: No compensation?
Syuen: Compensation? Pfft! Hah! I can buy a hundred of that box if I want to. Why should I care about one chocolate box that got sent to a garbage dump? You think you earned enough from me to get it? Get off the high horse, stupid!
Commander: If it's not yours, I'll send it back.
Syuen: !!! You! Stop being so annoying! Just keep it!
Commander: ...why? You said it isn't yours. No name. What if someone's trying to screw me over?
Syuen: URGGH! You opened it! So you keep it! It's high-quality real chocolate! Most expensive from Royal Road! Don't act like the sender wants to poison you! Stupid! Stupid!
Commander: ...so it's real?
Syuen: Yeah.
Commander: Honest down-to-earth chocolate?
Syuen: Yeah!
Commander: From you?
Syuen: Yea-ASJFaerojfhwejn
Commander: Thanks, Syuen.
Syuen: NO! Arggh! Whatever! Keep it and don't even think of sending it back! I have no need for things from a garbage dump.
Commander: Happy Valentine.
Syuen: You're messing with me, aren't you? Fine. I'll play along with your twisted fantasy, you must be desperate. Consider it a precious gift from Missilis Industry, wrongly sent to you.
Commander: Got my name and the address right though.
Syuen: Hah! Hahahaha! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Whatever, be grateful.
Commander: Want a reciprocal gift for White Valentine?
Syuen: ......as if I want something from you. By the way, just so you know. Nothing happened back in the Celebration Party.
Commander: .....sure.
Syuen: ......also, you're not such a bad Commander after all. So just accept the gift.
Commander: I'll keep it.
*BlaBla Chat Ended*
YOU ARE READING
Advising
HumorThe Commander goes through the advise sessions with everyone he has met.