Promise

Face

I-land I starting today. Riki left without saying a word since the day before yesterday. I didn't even see him since then. The first episode is airing today. I would've texted him good luck. But they aren't allowed on their phones for the entire show. Except for calling their parents I think.

I decided to just focus on training now. I don't have anything better to do anyway.
„Have you heard? Coaches from SM entertainment are visiting to pick some trainees"
I heard a girl say during break
„I don't really want to join SM entertainment tho, I heard a trainee died due to their extreme training" another girl said. I don't truly believe this rumour tho. But I'm pretty sure their training is almost as bad as dying.

After break the singing lesson started. I have improved since i started training and my vocal range got better. But I'm not proud in this moment. We're told to line up in front of the SM coach, youngjun. Without even listening to our voices he has to pick trainees just from their visuals. I never really thought I was pretty. I'm not confident in anything I'm doing if I'm being honest. Especially about my looks. So when he called my name, I couldn't really figure out why.
„Minji. If you lose about 5kg, you'll be unbeatable. I think you have a lot of potential." I felt flattered. Except for the losing weight part.
I wasn't even asked if I wanted to join. He just says „you can pack your bags now. SM entertainment accepts you" I feel my whole world crashing down. My vocal coach and the trainees around me clap for me. But I don't want them to.
„Do I have to" I ask as polite as I can. The SM coach looks caught off guard. „Minji you... when you signed your contract with Hybe entertainment, you also signed that you're okay with other companies trading you or taking you" my vocal coach explains. „So I have no choice?" I ask. She nods. „Until your contract expires" Coach youngjun just looks around awkwardly.

I knew SM entertainment was very strict. I was always afraid for their trainees since there were multiple rumours about what had happened in their „basements". I was actually planning on watching the first episode of I-land tonight. But as much as I know, sm entertainment also doesn't allow phones. So maybe I can watch it on the weekends? We must have a break once right?

And here I am now. I had to quickly pack my stuff, which was not a lot. 20 minutes later a taxi picked me up. During the drive I was actually thinking about running away. But that would only cause my mom problems. I wouldn't want them to sue me over something I chose to do.
Guess I need to face myself now.

Arriving there I quickly understand it's a lot worse than how people describe it. A few trainees my age walked past me, with fresh band aids on their face. They also looked really sweaty. Seems like I won't get a break for a while now. But it's okay, my contract ends in 3 months anyway. I'll only have to hold on until then, and hope I can see Riki again.

I look on my phone for the last time before I give it to the head coach. No messages from Riki. I don't know what I expected, I knew he wasn't able to text me. A part of me still hoped that he did. But, by the time I'm free, the survival show will most definitely end and if he won't make it, I'm sure he'll continue training.
He's born to be an idol.