The Forgiveable Journey Of The Cheated

31. Slowing Things Down

Charlotte has been phoning Liam’s sister and complaining about Jake. It is unclear why she would phone Liam’s sister and complain about her new boyfriend, but one can only suspect that she hopes that Liam will hear what she has to say, for she knows damn well it will reach his ears. Another question that seems unanswerable is why Liam’s sister is even talking to Charlotte. They had forged a certain friendship through Charlotte’s temporary inclusion in the family, but even though the official ties had been severed through the separation, they had not officially put an end to their friendship. So Charlotte is calling all of a sudden as though nothing had happened, as though talking on the phone about relationship woes is a natural occurrence between them. Liam’s sister feels a little sorry for Charlotte because it is clear that if she is calling, she really has no one to call. She hopes that Charlotte will eventually figure out that she is being distant, just hm hmming in response to Charlotte’s stream of consciousness (you might wonder if this lack of reaction is a family trait). Liam’s sister wonders when Charlotte will realize that she doesn’t really give a shit, but part of her is also curious and savoring a bit of Charlotte’s loneliness. 

Liam’s sister knows Liam wasn’t always easy to be with, but nobody deserves two-facedness. If Charlotte was so unhappy and Liam was so terrible, then divorce. Don’t treat someone like shit by sleeping with another guy, then come home and treat him like shit to his face as well. What the fuck is that all about? Anyway. We could lose ourselves in debating this issue, the causes and effects, the culprits and victims, but not now. 

The gist of Charlotte’s monologues is that she is unhappy and bored. Jake does not sound like he is at all invested in the relationship and also appears to be thoroughly unhappy. He goes to his hometown every weekend, works long hours (Liam’s sister suspects by choice), and complains of being tired before going to bed early. He hardly ever touches Charlotte. He eats supper at the table with her but there is nothing to say. She talks about the pregnancy and tries to stir up interest in the upcoming birth of his son or daughter, but even impending fatherhood does nothing to stimulate a reaction in him. Charlotte thinks she just picked a boring textureless guy. 

But really, Jake is a man who feels like he has been buried alive. 

She is beginning to miss Liam. In the wake of her unhappiness, she slowly raises onto a pedestal, for had he not loved her, had he not tried to keep her for himself, had he not done many things to attempt to please her and to ensure her happiness? 

To keep herself busy, she has been reading Gone with the Wind. She is swept up by the tale and identifies with Scarlett: Beautiful, charming and manipulative. Yes, even Charlotte has some perspective. She recognizes her search for the fulfillment of her needs and desires, with minimal consideration of others. Like Scarlett, she is shunned by the other girls and desired by men. Her image of Rhett, while starting out akin to the Rhett described in the book, has slowly taken on the shape of Liam. This phenomenon peaks at the height of Scarlett’s unhappiness when she realizes that Rhett truly saw her for what she is and still loved her while she had continued to treat him poorly. 

She is devastated when Scarlett, who has pretty much wasted all of her pretty years, admits too late her love, and receives a cold and definitive rejection. When she reads that famous final story line, Charlotte begins sobbing uncontrollably. When Jake returns home, he sees she is crying and asks why, for to not ask would be downright inconsiderate. She does not dare say the truth - that she has sabotaged her happiness. She tells him it’s the pregnancy hormones. 

She texts Liam’s sister and asks her to call her back, and then falls asleep on the couch. What does it matter where she sleeps, Jake doesn’t touch her on purpose anymore anyway.