after we finish burying the poor squirrel and we have decided that is enough of the pussy patrol we go back to wills house but to our surprise we see simon stood in wills kitchen
"alright guys" he greets us
"Jesus christ simon you scared the shit out of me! how did you get in here?" i turn to look at neil already knowing he would have left a door open
"back door was open" my thoughts were conferment
"mate what are you waring?" jay asks before wills can start yelling at neil for leaving the door open
he looks down at his outfit " it's a polo shirt and chinos"
you look like my cousin when he went for a job interview" neil says laughing
"oh is he a golf pro?"
"no he's got down syndrome" i answer smiling at simon
"look this is what everyone wares for golf, can i make some toast will?"
"pop one in for us si i'm just going to shit out a poo"neil walks to the bathroom and will tells him to open a window in it
suddenly the doorbell rings and will goes to answer it. i go to put some bread in the toaster for neil because my brother dosent seem to be making any.
will then returns with two cases of beer "who ordered these"
"i know i'm a genuine your mum left her card details on the laptops"jay says proudly
"that's for emergencies"
"it was an emergency your house is fucking boring" i let out a giggle from the kitchen walking to the fridge and getting the butter out
will then goes to open his laptop and the boys start giggling like children again
"what?" wills tone clearly done with them
"nothing"
"we haven't done anything with your facebook" i shake my head at what i hear they have done to his facebook
"toilets blocked" neil walks in and comes straight into the kitchen and i hand him the toast which makes him smile down at me and kiss my forehead
"you've blocked the toilet" will looks disgusted
"maybe i don't know i'm not a plumber"
the boys then complain about the smell and neil gives a full description of what it was like and will bans us from using his toilet and walks off
"that's it i'll tell my dad that benji did a shit in the house"
"did he" neil sits opposite them and pulls me down into his lap
"no but if i say he did we'll have to keep him outside the. i can wank freely" jay concludes
"well thank god for that" i say sarcastically
suddenly jay sees simons golf clubs and gets a brilliant idea
we are in wills back garden smashing up his flowers with a golf club "what's going on?" will storms outside
"watch this"neil then swings and hits the flowers and we all except from will laugh
"what the fuck are you doing?" will now seems infuriated
"this golf bat is perfect" i say pretty much wasted. we all are
"stop fucking vandalising
my garden!" will yells after neil hits it again
the boys try to convince him to hit them as well but will refuses and tells us we are going out again
we were all walking around the street and simon started to complain but i was too wasted to care at this point the only thing on my mind was neil
YOU ARE READING
wanker(the inbetweeners)
Humorneil sutherland x oc simon coppers sister olivia cooper has been friends with jay and neil for as long as she can remember and when will comes to the school and the group start ending up in a bunch of situations she will realise that she has deeper...
