terminal

So Embarrassing...

A new school year came faster than a hurricane, but Aviana was happy

to be back to classes, even if she felt so far behind her peers; She started

first just in the afternoon, since she was still so tired all the time, and

when she felt stronger and could wake up earlier, she incrementally made

each day longer until she was back to a full day of learning - only -

Aviana noticed that she couldn't keep up with her rambunctious peers;

It was first showing when they would run laps around the playground,

chase footballs and soccer balls through the fields, and she would just

lay down on a bench where she floated in and out of sleep the entire

recess; Then it was obvious when everyone would be excited for gym

class but Aviana would ask if she could sit out and read instead, and she

was always allowed to do so; But the final straw, the thing that made sure

that she knew that she wasn't like everyone else no matter how hard

she was trying was when they were at a school assembly for a guest

speaker, the auditorium was so warm and everyone was so close and

everyone smelled so strong and - Aviana tried to make it to her teacher

so she could ask to be taken to the school nurse, but when she got on

her feet to walk down the aisle to get to her teacher, everything became

so blurry and dark, and it just kept getting darker and darker, until she

could feel herself falling; Again, Aviana woke up in a hospital when

she hadn't been in one when her eyes were last open; and it wasn't

her parents with her, but her teacher with the school principal; Aviana

took measured breaths, asking "Are my parents on their way?"

Her teacher nodded her head, "Your dad is coming back from his

meeting that was out of town, and your mom is almost done with

your grandma's doctor appointment," which was stuff she forgot was

happening; Aviana relaxed and rolled her head back, expecting

silence, but they let her know more, "Your mom called and asked if

your sister - Brynn - could come sit with you. She'll be here any

minute now," and that seemed like a made-up possibility - could

it really be that easy? Could her parents really call and make that

request? She supposed that cancer could make people agree to loads

of things that ordinarily would not be permitted; Just as they said, Brynn

walked through the door in a huff with her school bag and sweat

making her hair stick to her forehead - but she smiles so big when she

sees Aviana in her bed with her eyes open - "I didn't finish lunch - do you

want my fruit snacks? Do you need something to drink?" Having

her sister's familiar face is comforting, and she nods to both questions

because she is hungry and she is thirsty; Once she's set up with

the bedside tray, Brynn asks everyone what happened, and when it

is all said and done, Aviana coos, "It is embarrassing to be so weak,"

which Brynn hates, "No, you're strong. Anyone who laughs at what

happened - that person is weak because they don't have a full heart,"

the perspective is nice, it is new, but it is comforting, and Aviana agrees:

Should anyone make fun of her for fainting then they aren't a person,

they're just a mean, soulless troll with no regard for anyone but themselves.