Finding Love Series #5: Quest For Dear

CHAPTER TWENTY [Unedited]

"You sure you don't want me to accompany you?"

Isa, dalawa, tatlo o maraming beses ng nakailang ulit na tanong si XL, ang fiance ko. Pero nakakapagtakha nga lang, imbes mainis sa pangungulit niya, bakit mas kinikilig pa ako dahil concern siya at nag-aalala?

But then again, ayoko pa ring magpasama sa kaniya dahil oras na malaman ni Nanay na fiance ko siya, alam ko ang mangyayari. Although, I don't have plan hiding him from my family. It's just that, I knew them too well.

It wouldn't take days to stay there. Bago sumapit ang hapon, byabyahe na ako pabalik ng maynila dahil may trabaho pa ako.

He looks unease and couldn't hide the worry and stress on his face. Parang siyang ama na concern na concern na ipabyahe mag-isa ang anak nang hindi siya kasama.

Ama? Anak? And why do I imagine him being a father to our child? Yung mapag-alaga, overprotective sa anak namin lalo na kapag sa babae, mapagmahal, hindi nakakalimutang halikan ang nuo nila, pagsabihan ng tama, palakihin ng maayos at hindi makakalimutang sabihin at iparamdam sa kanila na mahal na mahal niya mga anak namin.

Thinking about our future, about him and how we'll become a parent makes me teared up in happiness and scared at the same time. Maraming what ifs na nakalatag sa isip ko at alam kong pagdadaanan namin 'yun.

Being a parent is not easy. Yes, masarap kung paano makabuo ng anak pero kapag dumating na, duon mo lang marerealize na hindi madaling magka-anak. Specifically if you two are still young and haven't finished securing your future yet. Mahirap. Sobrang hirap ang magpamilya. Sa pagpapalaki pa lang ng anak, sa pagprovide ng mga pangangailangan nila bilang anak, sa paggabay sa kanila habang lumalaki para hindi mapariwara, ang pagtratrabaho para maipangbuhay sa araw-araw.

All of it were destined to happen once you chose to settled down. Mayroon pang mga oras na mag-aaway, magsisigawan, o hindi magkakasundo pero sa bandang huli, maayos rin. Hindi lang buhay mag-asawa ang maapektuhan, kundi mga anak na rin. Lalo pa kapag nasaksihan nila mismo ang away.

I cupped his face using my two hands while rosing abit because he's taller than me. Pinakatitigan ko ang nag-aalala niyang singkit na mata, makapal na kilay, matangos na ilong, mahabang pilik-mata, ang pink niyang labi at ang umiigting niyang panga ngayon.

His face wants to tell something more but he's just holding himself because he didn't wanted to be persistent. Lalo't alam niyang hindi niya talaga ako mapipigilan sa gusto.

I wanted to be him, alright. But I'm scared with the possibilities that my mother will take him as granted. There are still family problem from both side. Ako, hindi gusto ng family para sa kaniya. That made me hurt at the same time determine to prove them wrong whatever what they're have in their mind about me.

Him on the other hand will use my family as a sourcefull. Hihingian ng pera para sa pansariling kaligayan, gagamitin ang yaman para pagperahan at ipagmamalaki dahil nakapag-asawa ako ng mayaman. And I don't want that.

Ayos lang kung anong tawagin sa akin. Mukhang pera kahit may sarili rin akong pera na ginagastos, manggagamit kahit kaya ko naman ibili ang sarili ko ng mga bagay na gusto ko, gold digger or so whatever. I can endure every thing as long as they shouldn't involve XL about this.

I wouldn't stay still if they have ruin my fiance's name. If they have ruin his clean reputation as attorney.

"Don't worry about me, hmm? Isang araw lang naman ako mags-stay dun then balik na ako tomorrow. And besides, sanay na rin naman akong byumahe mag-isa. Nakarating pa nga ako sa Cebu para sa seminar namin." I laugh to lessen his worries but it didn't effect him though that's why I stopped from laughing. "Anyway, tatawag rin naman ako sayo kapag nakarating na sa bahay. Kaya stop worrying na, please? My...... Baby?"