The Widows Woman (GirlxGirl)

Do You Trust Me?

The first couple of hours were fine, she played on her phone and looked at pictures of her wife. A couple of days ago Carla had sent a mirror selfie a that she couldn't stop looking at. She wore a baggy t-shirt that just about covered her panties, her hair was wild but she had a beautiful smile and her bare legs were so sexy. The cop must have stared at that picture for at least an hour. Then the screaming began and she found this really hard to deal with. There was nothing she could do to ease her friends pain and it was heartbreaking to listen to. She had no idea how she'd cope when Carla was giving birth, she wouldn't be able to see or hear her in that much pain without losing her shit. It was hard enough right now and this was one of her best friends, not her wife.

She got off her chair and stretched, walking the empty waiting room, trying to ignore the horrifying screams coming from behind the doors. She couldn't focus her mind and her heart began to race, thumping against her chest with so much force she felt faint. She leant her back against the wall and knelt down, figuring if she did faint for the first time in her life, this would reduce injury.

Her mind was playing tricks on her. She could hear Abi's screams, Aaliyah's screams and Amy's, it was so loud inside her head she put her hands over her ears and started rocking her body, waiting for it to stop with her eyes closed. Her legs went numb, she had no idea how long she'd been down there but she couldn't move. Through the screams she could hear Carla's gentle voice telling her everything was ok, she would be ok and it reassured her and her physical symptoms began to lessen.

"Open your eyes and look at me."

The cop immediately opened her eyes and found her wife knelt in front of her, she hadn't imagined her voice, she'd been here all along.

"Breathe with me baby. Just breathe." The younger woman had both her hands on the cops shoulders, rubbing and squeezing, she didn't know if she could hear her but hoped she could feel her touch. She kissed her on the forehead and pulled her into her chest and started playing with her hair.

Carla's perfume filled Thea's nose and she could hear her steady heartbeat. It helped to regulate her own as she tried to match her wife's breathing and when she felt confident to remove her hands from her ears, she wrapped her arms around the younger woman and held onto her tight.

"Everything's ok, your ok. I've got you." Carla kept kissing the top of her head and held her until she seemed calmer.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't say sorry. Come on, let's stand you up and get you in a chair."

"I'm alright, I'm alright now."

"Sit down." Her wife's tone told her this was non negotiable. "You don't need to worry, everything's completely fine."

"I'm not worried. The screaming made me... I just lost it for a bit. I'm sorry."

"Stop saying sorry Thea, I mean it. You've done nothing wrong."

"I'm meant to be here supporting you and Rob, not making this harder." She was frustrated and placed her shaking hands on her thighs trying to get her usually calm and controlled demeanour back.

"Your not making this harder at all. It's all done baby, I only came out to tell you she's had a healthy baby girl and she's doing really well."

"But the screaming?"

"The screaming stopped ages ago babe, everything's fine."

"It's not fine! I'm hearing voices, I'm fucking losing it!"

Carla smiled and put her arm around her, squeezing her shoulders and kissing the top of her head before kneeling in front of her and taking her hands.

"Your not hearing voices. The screaming was pretty bad and it's just triggered a flashback, that's all. Your not going mad babe, I promise."