there for me

this is what slow dancing feels like

not proof read
kinda hate it

marley's pov
i woke up in pain. i wasn't surprised. i've been beat up many times, slammed around more than i can remember.

i didn't know my way around this house so i stayed in billie's room. the room was covered with things. a sheet had fallen from the wall revealing a lot of writing.

my eyes lingered on the walls before looking away. it felt like an invasion. i thought about billie as a teen. she's told me how scared she is of her teenage self. and i got that.

i would never want to go back to 13-17 i know technically i am still a teenager. the whole nineTEEN but i'm 20 soon. i don't feel 20.

i didn't think i would be 20.

my hands trailed over my body. my collarbones. my shoulders down my arms. across my ribs down my sides. i tried to ground myself.

i didn't know why this was happening. i slid off her bed down to the floor and dug my hands into my hair.

tears ran down my face i tried my best to stop.
billie woke up instantly confused.
"why are you on the floor" she chuckled folding over and crawling towards me. once she was laying beside my head on the bed she tilted my face towards her.

her demeanour instantly changed and she slid down next to me. "hey what's wrong, mars no it's okay" she brought me into her arms.

i calmed down after a minute wiping my eyes and taking a deep breath.
"sorry" "you have nothing to apologise for, what's up" she quickly cut me off

i just shook my head. i didn't know. "i think im just overwhelmed and over tired" i admitted laying my head on her shoulder.

she ran her fingers through my hair holding my head close. after a bit we left her room and headed it the kitchen.

it was a cozy home full of family pictures, awards and instruments. she lead me to the kitchen were her mum was making a green looking drink.

"good morning" she smiled as we sat down at the bench.

"morning ma" "good morning maggie"

"so what happened last night?" she got straight into it. billie started talking first. explaining the knocking and everything. then i explained the messages.

maggie nodded and we spent the morning talking. i was still intimidated by the woman.

later in the day we both went back to my apartment for girls night. i have to make the most of my days off.

the second i walked into the apartment the girls ran up to me. "what happened to your face" willow asked grabbing my face with her hands. looking at the bruises.

"got punched, he was pretty weak so it wasn't that bad" i snickered and billie elbowed me. she wasn't happy i was so okay about it.

i know she doesn't like seeing me hurt or whatever but come on. the guy was weak.

"and what about these bruises" alyssa was behind me lifting my jumper after inspecting me for any other injuries. she's like an over protective mother.

"got beaten up at work, drunk people are harder to control than sober ones" i explained and they narrowed their eyes at me.

"you have to be more careful, i know you can defend yourself but mars come on" willow said going back to the kitchen.

fresh cookies in the oven. like always when she finds out billie is coming over.
"ooo a new recipe this week?" bil said running over to her. alyssa and i shared a look of amusement.

i got changed into some fresh clothes brushing my hair. after returning to the main area august and madeline had arrived. alyssa and her claim to be just friends.

tonight we were playing card games as the others had bought some new ones.
todays pasta was a creamy bow tie thing with alot of other stuff in it i didn't pay attention to.

it was a cold night. our balcony doors were open allowing a nice breeze come in. our record player played low jazzy tunes as willow walked around turning all the little lights on, rather than the big one.

we were all sat on the couch with some wine. laughing like any group of girls would. billie had her arms wrapped around me with her head rested on my shoulder.

madeline was on the other couched and alyssa was sat right beside her with her legs over the girl. lyss laid back against be arm rest playing with madis jumper.

when august asked the question "what is something you've done that you never thought you would" i watched them exchange a glance.

"dinner guys" willow called from the kitchen. everyone swarmed instantly.
we sat around the table and i have a realisation that these times are the memories ill be telling people about when i'm older.

i'd tell them how my friends and i would join every fortnight or so at my apartment drinking wine, eating pasta and playing board games.

willow and alyssa were talking about how they had to leave town again tomorrow as they were only back for 2 days for reflection. (and not because i forgot they were on placement)

after dinner i watched as billie's face lit up. "oh i love this song" she said standing up and pulling me with her. she lead me out to the balcony and pulled me into her.

with my hands on her waist we started swaying with the music.
moving around eachother in sync we were slow dancing in the dark.

laughter from inside calmed me and i rested my head ontop of hers. she started singing and i swear her voice is perfect for jazz.

i tilted my head down looking into her eyes. her eyes were always mesmerising then again everything about her was.

her perfect smile, her unique style absolutely everything about her.

i love her.