Stained Glass Eyes and Colorful Tears

16

~ One day before Texas ~

Tony has been working so crazy hard lately on the new PTV album that they're currently recording. Each night he's been getting home later and later and some mornings he even heads off an hour earlier than he's supposed to in order to put some work in at the studio. Poor guy's perfectionism is going to exhaust him to death, which is why I decided that today I would go and pick him up and take him out for lunch as a little much needed break. I got the idea yesterday when he told me that he's starving every day by 6pm because he's been too focused in the studio to eat, so I figured why not take him out for once to show him how proud of him I am. I asked him if he ever goes out to eat, which he responded by saying he doesn't like going out to eat alone and that he'd rather focus on recording. I think a break would do him good, though.

I happily make my way down the hall to the recording studio where I was told he was working this morning. My hand that was about to reach out to the doorhandle stops an inch above it, my eyes locked onto the situation in the room. I can feel everything in my body, from my muscles to my heart just stop.

Usually when recording, Anna would be on the other side of the glass actively recording Tony, but right now that's not the situation at all. Tony and Anna are sat inside the studio side by side, way too close. Tony is strumming his guitar softly while Anna watches him in a way that gets me angry. I watch as she says something to him, leaning in as she does so. Tony stops strumming his guitar as he laughs at whatever she says. He looks up at her and suddenly everything feels like it's in slow motion.

I watch as Tony, my husband, leans forward towards Anna, his coworker, and kisses her. His hand that was just on the guitar reaches out and grabs onto the side of her face softly, just like he's done to me hundreds of times. I stare in complete and utter disbelief as I watch them kiss, my heart breaking with every second that their lips stay connected. Tony pulls away from the kiss first, smiling sweetly at Anna before he turns his attention back to his guitar. Anna goes back to watching him play, a happy smile on her face. 

Neither of them has any idea that I'm standing here right now, watching them, so, I make sure it stays that way. Slowly and quietly I back away from the door, keeping my eyes on them the entire time. Once I'm out of their possible range of vision, I turn and speedwalk out of the building, ignoring the eyes of everyone I pass on my way out.

My mind races with questions and thoughts as I drive back home. How long has this been going on for? Why didn't I see the signs sooner? Was Tyler right all along, and they've been fucking behind our back for months? I had been checking Tony's phone sometimes ever since Tyler told me about him and Anna, but with the exception of those two flirty texts since one time, I haven't seen anything else. I thought it was done, it was a one time flirty thing that they realized they shouldn't do, or were just doing because they were spending so much time together that they got caught up in the moment or something. Watching them, I can see that this isn't a caught up in the moment thing, this is a choice. A choice Tony is making.

Why the fuck would Tony do this to me and what am I supposed to do now?

I get home and run into the house, desperate to be back somewhere familiar where I can be alone, yet when I step inside I don't feel like I am home. I feel like I'm somewhere where I've been living a lie. This whole house feels tainted now. 

Out of the corner of my eye I see the suitcases Tony and I never bothered to unpack from our little weekend trip two weekends ago, and right then I know what I have to do.