if only..

chapter 27 - movies

(last chapter doesn't really revolve around the plot too much, nor does it get mentioned again after THIS chapter. It was mostly kind of a vent for me, so I apologize if you didn't like last chapter. Please don't pay a lot of attention to that chapter.) 

TW

      I think its september, Donnie had-... touched me in august. I couldn't stop thinking about that night. And my instincts were always on alert, whenever he came by, my legs felt limp and weak, my mind would go blurry as I tried to keep a smile. I think this was normal, this is what couples would do, and Donnie finally loved me. This wasn't like the times in the cell, those times I can't even remember. Now, it was to vivid. Too real. That didn't feel normal to me. Not many things were normal in my life but at least I could forget easily, not anymore though. 

    When I sat on the couch, I always looked behind me every minute. When I'm in the restroom, I always make sure the door is locked. When I'm anywhere, I'm ready to fight for my life. I don't like feeling in danger all the time, I just wish that for one damn second I would be safe, feel safe. Not just someone saying everything will be okay, I want to know nothing bad will happen. But of course that's too much for me to ask of anyone, isn't it?

     I can't get out of bed today, don't want to. Well, that and Donnie won't let me. His hands grab onto my waist, his nose digging into my collarbone. And not in a soft comforting way, it was harsh and painful. But I couldn't do anything about it, because - of course - he was the one who was in control. 

   knock knock

    Raphael walks in with a pink apron, a bright smile plastered on his face. Holding two plates with eggs and bacon, setting it down on the drawer next to me. "Raph thought you two love birds would like breakfast" 

   I smile warmly, though I knew it was fake. "Thank you Rapha" 

   His big hand pats my head, and I can tell Donnie was glaring at him. But with the only strength of my hand, I try to rub circles on his palm. Which calms him down, to an extent. Thank God raph doesn't notices, so he just leaves. With the abrupt shut of the door, I was alone again with Donnie. It felt good, but at the same time I always felt in danger. 
 

         "Would you like to watch a movie soon? I've made a new high quality TV just for us" I hear Donnie whisper into my ear, sending shivers down my spine. I nod slowly, a movie would help get my mind off of things. 

     "mhm.. sounds nice, what movie would you want to watch?"
     "you can chose the movie, I don't care"

       "Wanna watch Twilight?" 

        "yeah sure, never seen it before."

 I shift my body to stare at him with a shocked gasp, something that seems obviously for jokes. He giggles at me. 

        "what?" he asks with innocence
        "You've never seen Twilight?!" I frown, shaking my head as I try to stand up, and thank God he let me go. I place my hands on my hips, staring at Donnie with a disappointed look. 

       "Get up, come on. Show me where the damn TV is so I can show you REAL cinema." I demand. He shrugs, turning over to grab a small square remote on his drawer next to his side of the bed. He presses a button, where S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N comes in with a huge rectangle screen riding on his back as he hovers to the end of the bed - placing it down gently before turning around and flying back to wherever he came from. 

    My jaw dropped as I stare at the extremely expensive looking thing that I couldn't even tell what type of TV it was. 

        "I guess I don't need to go anywhere..." I say quietly as I scoot back into bed, placing myself into the spot I was before. I stare blankly as he giggles at my expression "holy hell Donnie you've fucking outdone yourself.." 

    I turn to him, and his face has a deep scarlet red on his green-teal face. "do you have a praise kink?" I ask without thought, that just made him light up as a tomato. 

   He doesn't reply but instead turns on the first film of the Twilight saga, the intro playing loud but not too loud at the same time. I just smiled, I felt a lot more comfortable now, I feel safe almost. I rest in Donnies arms, letting it wrap around me in a tight embrace as I feel his breaths tickle down my neck, sending shivers with it. I close my eyes, letting this moment sink in before my eyelids flutter open again as I stare back at the TV, enjoying the film..