BROKEN COURAGE (Broken Redemption Book 3)

Chapter 30

Lucas

"You're going to sign those forms and trust that the doctors will do everything in their power to bring her back to you. She needs this, Luc. It's the only way to make sure she's okay."

Knowing she's right, I take the tablet and stylus from the nurse, and for the next few minutes, I sign and date section after section of the multiple forms she brings up on the screen. Fifteen minutes later, I lay my sleeping daughter on the gurney, and then watch helplessly as she's wheeled away from me. Though I'm grateful she's asleep and unaware we've been separated, I cringe at the thought she might wake up to find me gone and assume I've left her.

"The sedation. She won't wake up alone, right? After the hell she's been through, I don't want her waking up to faces she doesn't recognize."

"I give you my word that you'll be at her side when she wakes. She's in excellent hands, Mr. Holt. We'll look after her like she's one of our own." Swallowing down a sob, I look away from her kind eyes and gentle smile. "When she's finished, we'll be moving her upstairs to a room in pediatrics. There's a family waiting area up there where your friends should be more comfortable. When you're ready, let the front desk know and someone will escort you up. She should be done in about an hour."

"Thank you, Doctor Harper," Jenny answers for me when I'm unable to speak.

"It's my pleasure. Take as long as you need."

Like she knows I'm on the verge of falling apart, she exits the room, leaving Jenny to console me. Stepping forward, she wraps me up in a hug. With my face buried in her hair, I cry for my sweet Mallory, who I've just handed over to strangers in hopes they can confirm she is indeed going to be okay. I cry for Alyssa and Embree, the other missing pieces of my broken heart. Both still missing and at the mercy of whoever has them. What if they're hurt, too? My mind spirals with the possibility and the thought steals my breath. If anything happens to them, I swear to fucking Christ, I will find the men who did this and I will turn their world to soot and ashes. Starting with her idiot ex-husband, who brought this hell to their doorstep. They will all pay. If it's the last thing I do, I will destroy everyone involved.

Once we're settled in the private waiting room upstairs, I lay my head back against the wall and close my eyes. Waiting for word on how she's doing takes me back to those times I spent waiting for Embree outside her doctor's office.

I'm a damn fool.

Why I thought I couldn't love the baby she's carrying is beyond me now. The minute I found Mallory in that cave and pulled her into my arms I knew with certainty I could love any child brought into the world by that woman. Not because I yearn to be a father—a recent revelation for sure—but because those kids are part of the woman I love. I'm so angry at myself for not realizing it sooner and as I sit here worried sick not knowing where they are, I'm concerned about what the stress of this situation is having on her pregnancy.

It terrifies me to think she could lose the baby, even more, that she could lose it before I get the chance to tell her I'm already in love with him or her. That it would be my honor if she'd let me be a father to them as well. And when I think of that little baby, feeling the anguish and fear within its mother's womb... I want so badly to get a chance to turn all of that around. Instead, I want that unborn miracle to experience the depth of our love. I want them to feel how desperately they're wanted because their very existence completes us in ways we never imagined.

"Hey, man."

I look up in time to watch James and Tyler join us in the small waiting room. James takes the seat next to me, while Tyler sits on the other side of my sister. His expression is a mix of guilt and regret, I wish I could take away. What happened isn't his fault. If anyone is to blame, it's me.