CONNECTED BY FATE | Jaehyun BND

22| Breaking down

Yewon's pov:

We have finished our task after two hours.

We tidied up, and I rushed to leave without him, – after bidding a quick farwell.– But, for some reason, he followed me, and it was of no use to quick my peace, as he'd follow me anyway.

We exited the library, and Jaehyun stopped me, grabbing my wrist. I sent him a glance to talk while yanking my wrist from his hold.

He sighed -. Yewon, can we talk?
– About what? – I ask, fearing what I have been fearing since I saw him in class.
– About what happened in the hospital.
I sigh, – No.
–Please –. He looks at me as a puppy, making me groan as he looks so cute.
- Ok, but not here. Let's go to a cafeteria or something -. I sigh.

He cheered, and an elderly woman approached us.

- You guys are so cute together -. She says.
- What? -. I ask.

Don't tell me she thinks we are a couple. Like, ok, I know we - for some reason, - are matching, but I don't want to date him anyway.

- You are so cute -. She sighs -- Ah~ young love. You look like my daughter with her soulmate. Sadly, I lost mine some years ago...
- I'm so sorry ajjuma - Jaehyun says.
She shakes her head -. It's ok. I have to say that if you're soulmates. Fate did a good job putting you both together. - She smiles -. By the way, good luck, I hope you'll be happy together.
- We are -. Jaehyun smiles.

I glared at him. What the fuck is he saying? Is he playing along?

- Ah, sorry, ajjuma. But we're not together. We're just classmates -. I say.
- Ah well. Sorry, you look so cute together, and you're matching, so I thought...
- It's ok.
- Well... bye~ - Jaehyun says.

We bid goodbye to her and walked away, well, he, because the woman stopped me with her stick.

- Young lady -. She says -. He's a good boy. Don't push him away. You'll end up with him anyway.
I looked at her confused -. Sorry?
- I'm saying that what happened to your parents doesn't have to happen to you.

For some reason, I feel like she either knows something that I don't or she understands me.

- My mother told me that too -. I smile softly.
- Let me tell you a secret. My father suffered a lot as my mother hated him and left without saying anything. I then hated fate and didn't want a soulmate, but as I met mine, I changed my mind, even though I pushed him away so many times -. She says -. I know you're pushing him away for a reason. I can see it your eyes. You're scared of something happening, and he's falling for you. Maybe he has already fallen.
- Why are you telling me this? How do you...
- I know a lot of things even though I'm old. I understand you because I suffered the same, so listen to me and don't push him away. Don't be afraid of loving and risking everything you have.

I don't know what to say.

- Thanks, ajjuma -. I say.
- It's nothing. Now go with him.

I nod and run towards Jaehyun, who is already far.

When I caught up on him, he looked at me confused.

I think he didn't notice I was still with that nice woman.

We entered a cafeteria and sat far away from everyone.

- So... what did you want to talk about? -. I ask, flustered.
He cleared his throat -. About what happened in the hospital.
I'm going to play dumb - What happened?
- Seriously, have you forgotten?

I nod, making him sigh.

- our kiss...

Ok, the conversation that I have tried too hard to avoid finally arrived.

- Uh?
- You said you were cold, and I.... told you if you wanted a kiss as i couldn't hug you. You... suddenly kissed me, and uh....
- Ok, I know where this is going -. I stop him -. Skip the details.
He made a thin line with his lips -. The thing is that... you suddenly kissed me when I thought you would refuse. I wanted to know why.

Oh... that's the question I have asked myself a lot of times.

Why did I do that? What got into me to do so?

- I don't know too... I just... did it without thinking -. I say, guilty -. I'm sorry -. I bit my lip and looked at my lap.
- Why are you sorry? -. He asks, clearing his throat. He sounds too happy for some reason. - I mean, uh... I should be the one apologizing. My mother told me that I had to hold your hand for you to wake up, I did, but it didn't work, so I called a doctor, and he said that I had to... kiss you.

What the hell?!

- Don't tell me you freaking kissed me while I was unconscious -. I sharply say. I understand why he did it, but this is an excuse to push him away.

He averted his eyes as he was red and scratched the back of his neck.

I sigh -. So... you wanted to talk about this for what? Remind me that I have gone crazy and tell me you freaking kissed me while I was vulnerable?
- That's not what i...
I stood up, slamming my hands on the table -. I don't know why the hell are we soulmates, why fate paired me with you? Out of all the people, it had to be you, why?!
- Yewon... cal...
- No. I hate fate, and I don't want a soulmate. I don't need anyone. But then, why the hell am I fated with you?! -. My eyes teared up.

This is the best for us. I need him to hate me or, at least, dislike me, so that neither of us suffer.

I'm sorry, Jaehyun-ah. I also want to tell you my reasons, but I can't.

I sighed and took my bag, I was going to leave the poor boy there when he stopped me.

I looked at him.

- I'm your soulmate -. He states -. Do you still don't want me? - His voice broke.
I sigh -. I'm sorry, but I don't need you and neither i want you.

He gulped, and I knew he's crying. But I can't do anything.

- Can you at least tell me why? Why don't you give me a chance? I promise I...
- Don't promise me anything. You'll break it someday.
- Yewon -. He sobs.
- I'm sorry. But I can't risk any of us getting hurt. -. I say -. I'm very sorry -. I leave. Tears threatening to fall.

I then started to run.

I'm sorry, Jaehyun-ah, for hurting you, for pushing you away from me, for leaving you there, for rejecting you... I don't deserve you, and you deserve someone better than me.

I just... I'm afraid of you hurting me. The same thing that my mother went through happens to us or the same that my ex did happen again with you this time. I can't risk you getting hurt just for me, I can't see you broken, so I have to do this.

I have to push you away. I have to stay away from you.

Because I'm scared not only to get hurt or to go through what my mother did, but also I'm afraid of loving you and risking everything for someone again.

When I arrived home, I locked myself in my room and cried.

If I give you all my love and everything to you, will you do the same? Will you love me as much as I do? Will you risk me your fame and everything for me?

●●●●●●●●●

Yewonnie is scared, even though it seemed that she was warming to Jae, but turns out she hasn't.

Also, who is cutting onions? ㅠㅡㅠ.

Thanks for your support 💙.

Be healthy!