Islan-Dise

Believe Him

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••Warning this chapter contains strong sexual content and domestic violence••••

Rain
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Living in a friend of the families attic was not in my plans, ever. My options were few. My parents wanted to rip out my throat for responding to Boon, but they didn't understand the way I felt about him.

Hell, neither did I.

Developing feelings for someone like him was risky. It would either be beautiful or pain and regret. One thing I can't deny is the way my heart crumble all the times I didn't reply. I knew it was difficult for Boon to accept I was ignoring him. The second my place landed in Chicago, my parents informed me that ICE was to us.

My parents are older now and this fleeing should be behind us. They should be able to rest but still they live with the fear of being forced to return to Haiti. A place they haven't called home for 12 years. I remember the horrors of trying so desperately to get to America but the bravery my parents endured. Just so my sister and I could have a better life. My mom was pregnant at the time and almost lost my sister because of the harsh conditions of trying to get here. When we made it, I still can see my dad dropping to his knees and kissing the ground.

"Nou te fè li" he cried
(We made it)

I was aware of the sacrifices they made to bring us here but everyday I worked hard to make it up to them. I went to school to be a doctor. The scholar of the family because I caught on to Americas education easy. It was easier for me to learn the language. Whereas my parents struggled. So I was dragged with them to handle bills, and enrolling myself into school, to the doctor appointments and government funded programs. It was and honor to hell my parents out but mostly, I just wanted to play with dolls and play in my moms makeup and clothes.

It was a fight between my parents upon learning I was feminine and possibly gay. Then when they were called to the school for me kissing a boy on the bus, it was confirmed and we worked through it as a family.

I gave up on my dreams of being a doctor when Zell wanted to isolate me from family, friends and my dreams. He wanted control over me.

My sister is now 11 years old. Just a couple years older than when we first came here. She is the only one that can be here legally. It saddens me to see her having to hide with us, like some rat in an alleyway. She's the smartest, and prettiest girl on this earth.

"Even though it's under these circumstances...it's nice having you back home." Alana smiles as I braid her hair.

"It was time I come home." I return the smile.

"It sucks things didn't get better with your husband. He was really nice at first."

"Yeah, he was. It's okay. I'm young and have plenty time to fall in love again."

She blushes. "Will it be with this new guy? The one mommy and daddy were upset you contacted?"

"Nosey." I pull her hair.

"What? They still don't know I can understand creole. I'm going to keep it that way, so I can always know what they're talking about."