Hi, Ehm I would warn you that this has a few sensitive topics in it, and it's low key inspired to The Black Swan movie but than I also not that much. It also doesn't have that much to do with Ani, but he's in it!
——————I was walking in circles around my room not being able to escape the bad thoughts. Why did I say that, and why didn't I do what he told me, can't I be better?. I asked myself as I felt small tears appearing in my eyes. I walked over to my desk and sat down on the chair in front of it. The chair was cold and hard, but I had a small pink pillow on it that made it more comfortable. I smiled softly at the pink pillow feeling really girly, but the smile disappeared the second I locked eyes with myself through the mirror. The tears that had been resting in my eyes were now running down my cheeks, and I started panicking. I quickly looked away from the mirror and fell of my chair, I gasped as I landed on my butt. "Fuck!" I cried out when I realized that I didn't just land on my butt, but my hand felt numb. The doors shut open and a worried Obi wan stood in the door frame. "What happened?!" He asked worried as he speed over to me and knelled down on the floor. "Nothing, I'm fine" I lied trying to hide the pain, but a scream left my mouth when he took my hand. "Holy force y/n!" Obi wan said and picked me up so I was now on my feet again, and another scream left my wide open lips. Obi wan had now picked me up in bridal style and carried me to the medical wing.
I woke up seeing two figures standing in front of me, I groaned as I tried rubbing my eyes, but was unsuccessful due to my hand being wrapped in. "Y/n" I heard a familiar voice say and I immediately knew it was Anakin's. He put his hand on my cheek and gently stroke it like I was a fragile object. He just to always push me around and play with me, but this time he was so calm and gentle that it was slightly concerning. "What happened..?" I asked weakly and Anakin removed his hand from my cheek and crossed his arms. "You broke your hand and passed out on the way to the medical wing" Obi wan said and I looked at him confused, not remember anything. "You're free to go Mrs y/l/n" a female voice said and entered the room. "Thank you!" Anakin said and helped me up from the bed, but I felt weirdly weak.
Anakin had helped me into my own room, and put me comfortably in my bed, he left about 10 minutes ago to help Obi Wan with a task so I was left alone. I sat up in my bed and sighted softly, I pushed my blanket off and got out of bed to use the restroom. But as I walked into my own small little living room I saw the desk and I immediately remembered what happened. I gulped and almost ran into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I collapsed on the floor and felt myself starting to shake.
I didn't know why I felt this way, I just didn't know what to do with myself. I felt so sick of myself and I guess that was the reason, I couldn't even look in the mirror without having a panic attack.
I didn't tell anyone about it tho and it only developed into something more serious.A week later I was walking around the halls. when I got to Padmes room i stopped walking and just stood in front of her door. I couldn't decide if I was going to knock on her door or just let her be, but in the end I made up my mind and continued walking. I walked and I walked and I walked till I was getting more and more tired. I started walking back to my room but immediately stopped when I saw someone walking on the Balcony. none of the Jedis were here and no one other than them walked there. I tried getting a better look at who it was, but I couldn't see their face. So I decided to see who it was for myself. When I was almost just behind the person they moved behind a big tree, i sighted getting more and more tired, but I continued walking.
When I got behind the big tree no one was there, I looked around the place confused and I screamed when I felt a pair of hands grab me. "It's me!" Anakin yelled and pulled me in his arms, tears began to run down my cheeks, and I collapsed into his arms. "Shh it's okay, it's okay" he said and stroke my hair softly, while I kept sobbing. "Let's get you back inside" he said and picked me up and carried me to his room.
I woke up the next day confused, I remembered what happened last night, but I was still wondering who the person was. "You're awake!" Anakin said as walked over to me and sat beside me on his bed. "Who was that..?" I asked and he looked down at his hands like he knew something I didn't. "Ani?" I asked and he looked at me with a small but warm smile. "You need to rest, you have some brain damage" he said and I looked at him confused, but as I opened my mouth to say something Padme barged into the room. "Y/n..!!" She said and ran over to me and pulled me into her arms. "Oh I'm so glad you're okay!" She said and took my face in her hands and looked all over my face for any sign of pain or scratches. "What's going on?" I asked more seriously this time but the only answer I got was Padme and Anakin looking at each other with pure worry in their eyes. And by the expression on their faces I knew it wasn't good.
They left me alone to take care of myself but Anakin sat outside of the door to the room if anything happened, and I was still confused as to why they didn't want to give me an answer. I got myself some clothes Padme had left me on the table that stood beside the bed, and I picked it up walking towards the bathroom, I opened the door and my heart stopped when I saw the mirror.
UGLY PIG
was written with red lipstick on the mirror, I quickly took the towel that was laying on the counter and wiped it away, I started panicking when it didn't come off all the way, so I splashed water all over it. It came off pretty well in the end and I sat down with my back against the door, I let out a sight as my thoughts started running this time I couldn't escape them and I ended up passing out on the cold hard floor.
"Wake up!" Someone unfamiliar said and my eyes shot open. It was a nurse but besides the nurse five other nurses were standing. My heart started to pound faster and the nurse quickly gave me something I had to drink, so I did and I was out again.
"Is she going to survive?" I heard voices say, they weren't clear but I heard it, I turned a little in the bed I was laying in and I tried opening my eyes, but it was almost impossible. "We don't know" someone said and I got confused, but I was so weak that I stopped worrying about it and only thought about the pain I was currently in. "She's awake" someone said and I heard footsteps approaching me. "Mrs y/l/n, it's good to see you up" they said and I opened my eyes slowly. "What's going on.." I said weakly as I tried to sit up but I was gently pushed back into the position I was in before. "Relax" the nurse said as she gave me some pills I had to swallow. "Good" she said and padded my face softly. "Mrs y/l/n are you okay?" The nurse said concerned and she put her fingers on my pulse. "ITS GOING DOWN!" She yelled and I heard people running around the room.
"She's not going to make it.." was the last thing I heard before it all went black.