My Chieftess... ✨Scripted✨ version

Episode 6: Return of Thor Bonecrusher

Krogan: You're a hard man to find. And, harder to kill, apparently.

Viggo: What do you want from me?

Krogan: That's the wrong question. The real question is, what can we do for each other? Allow me to fill you in on what's transpiring as we speak, hm?

(Scene switches to Snotlout flying along on Hookfang, doing a perimeter check of Dragon's Edge. He spys what appears to be two viking women with long blonde plaits, arriving in a rowing boat.)

Snotlout: Hm. Yeah, I see 'em, Hooky. What do we say we go introduce ourselves? Comin' in hot! (He lands next to the two "women".) Well, hello, ladies. What brings you to- HUH?! (The "women" turn around, revealing themselves to be large outcast men wearing long blonde wigs.) That is false advertisement.

Outcast Man 1: Sorry, we couldn't risk being seen.

Outcast Man 2: (twirling a plait) Besides, we rather like the look.

Snotlout: What are you Outcasts doing on Dragon's Edge?

Outcast Man 1: Alvin has been kidnapped by a group of bandits. We've tried everything to get him back, paying ransom after ransom, but nothing works and we fear for his life.

Outcast Man 2: We're desperate. We need someone with the power, strength and charisma to return our morale and our Chief. Someone like-

Outcast Man 1: Thor. Thor Bonecrusher.

Fishlegs: Whoa!

(Scene switches to the Riders having a meeting back on the Edge.)

Snotlout: I couldn't believe it either. I guess they heard of his exploits on Berk, his "heroic acts of unparalleled bravery," and are convinced that he's the only one who can go up against these bandits. No way.

Hiccup: They don't want our help?

Snotlout: Yeah. I mean, they won't risk bringing in dragon riders, because these bandits seem to be on edge. Hair trigger stuff. They might just see us and kill Alvin on the spot.

Tuffnut: Heh.

Snotlout: They got 'em pretty freaked out. But there is one brave man who could really rally those Outcasts and run point in getting Alvin back. Big props to TB.

Tuffnut: What?

Hiccup: Oh, for Thor's sake.

Fishlegs: (nervously) Well, I think if they need Thor Bonecrusher, we should call on him, right?

Snotlout: Great idea, Fishface!

Hiccup: Terrible idea, Snotlout! Bringing Thor back is way too dangerous. For you included.

Snotlout: Stop it. He was fine. In fact, he was perfect.

Hiccup: He almost got you killed.

Fishlegs: (indignantly) Are you saying I'm not brave enough? Not powerful enough? That I can't do this, Hiccup?

Snotlout: (Backing him up delightedly) Oh, yeah? Is that what you're saying about my boy?

Hiccup: I'm saying, Fishlegs, that you don't even know Thor Bonecrusher. He took you over. Sure, he was brave and awesome. But, he was almost too heroic. He was reckless and out of control. You just aren't that guy in your core. We'll figure something else out. But no Thor Bonecrusher for now.

(Scene switches to Snotlout's hut, that evening. Snotlout is applying Monstrous Nightmare Gel to his face and arms.)

Fishlegs: So, you do this every night? I, uh, had no idea.