Glass Heart

Part Sixty-Nine

Malias POV:

I woke up and as promised, Kylie was sitting right next to me when I opened my eyes.

I turned to her, she was dozed off, but her hand was on mine.

"Kylie," I whispered, my voice hoarse.

I felt even worse than yesterday.

My throat was dry, my eyelids felt heavy.

Not to mention the insane pain that was still coursing through my left side.

The pain was higher now, making its way to my rib.

I wanted to look at the wound, but I was too scared to do so.

I was scared of what was happening.

Anyways, Kylie jumped up immediately upon hearing my voice.

She looked at me, smiling when we made eye contact.

"Hey baby," Her voice was raspy, letting me know that she'd been sleeping for a while.

I smiled, but winced when I felt the stabbing pain jolt through me.

Kylie's eyebrows immediately furrowed, concern crossing her face before I could even blink.

"It's okay," I said, regaining my composure. "I am completely fine."

Kylie didn't buy it. Not for a second. She made that clear.

"You're lucky you're so you, or else i'd be frustrated with you." Kylie kissed my forehead.

I smiled, my hand coming to my side without her noticing.

I had a sudden feeling course through my body.

I felt the need to tell her something important, something she deserved to know.

"Kylie, i'm sure you're wondering what Dr. James and I talked about." I said, causing Kylie to immediately sit down.

Her stare was intentful, she looked at me with a sense of longing.

It's as if she's been waiting for this moment.

"Okay," She said, leaning back in her chair a little.

She never broke eye contact.

This girl.

She knows that I won't be able to lie to her. Not when she looks at me with those eyes.

I cleared my throat, I felt my face get hot.

The corners of Kylie's mouth came up, and that's how I knew that she knew what she was doing.

She can make me flustered in an instant, she knows it.

Anyways, it's time to tell her.

"So basically, I have anxiety. You know that I get stressed easily," Kylie nodded as I spoke. "But I never really explained how serious it was. I think it's only fair you know."

Kylie nodded, her eyes telling me to go on.

So that's what I did.

"My anxiety is always changing, always adapting. It's completely irresolute. I grew up with anxiety. I honestly can't remember a moment where I didn't have it."

Kylie continued to look, her eyes analyzing mine.

I felt a lump in my throat.

I never talk about this. Not with anyone.

Not even Ivory knows how bad it was. She was too young to remember.

I cleared my throat before going on.

"When I was in fourth grade, I developed a panic disorder. CRPS. Do you know what that is?"

Kylie nodded.

"Chronic regional pain syndrome. Malia, I never knew."

I just nodded. It was too late to go back now, and if I stopped, I'd cry.

So I didn't stop.

"I couldn't walk for around seven months. I quite literally couldn't use my legs."

Kylie's face turned to shock.

Her hand came to mine, but I paid no attention to it.

It's hard to talk about.

Me even opening up about this to Kylie shows just how much I need her in my life.

"I was in a wheelchair and it was caused by my anxiety."

Kylie's eyebrows furrowed even more, soemthing that shouldn't be humanely possible.

"How did the doctors not know? Shouldn't they know?"

I smiled, really truly feeling Kylie's surprise.

But I just shook my head. 

"Nope. It wasn't on a hospital record, because physically, there was nothing wrong with me. It was all mental, Ky. My brain quite literally told my leg it didn't work, and I believed it."

There was silence for a moment, as Kylie tried to understand what I had told her, and I tried to comprehend how I got myself to tell her soemthing so personal.

She's Kylie, so it shouldn't surprise me.

"Thank you for telling me, Malia. For trusting me. I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

Kylie validating my feelings was so important.

I think that was made clear when I started bawling.

Kylie immediately stood up and pulled me close, gently enough to where it didn't hurt my side.

I cried into her stomach for what felt like forever.

I only pulled away because I saw my tears staining her shirt, and I heard a knock on the door.

I sat up, Kylie wiped my tears.

"Coming," She said as she dried the last one.

She walked over to the door and peeked through the blinds that covered the window.

She turned back to me.

"Looks like you have some visitors. Should I open it?"

I couldn't tell how her voice sounded.

Monotone.

Who'd be visiting me right now?