Under Your Scars || Sebastian Sallow x MC

Chapter 45 - The Last Sallow

sallow (noun) : any of several Old World broad-leaved willows (such as Salix caprea) native to Europe and Western Asia

The more than you say, the less I know

Wherever you stray, I follow

I'm begging for you to take my hand

Wreck my plans

That's my man

Willow

-Taylor Swift

____________

Juliette POV

The fifth anniversary of Anne's death put into glaring perspective just how much time had passed since Sebastian pushed me out of his life. It was not entirely his fault; I had my own part to play, but it was not for lack of trying.

Each letter I wrote after the funeral had gone unanswered, but I never stopped writing. I wrote to him when I thought he would need it most. Even when I was on the arm of another man, I wrote to Sebastian. I could never sever our connection completely, and perhaps reuniting with him had finally helped me understand why.

I loved him.

I loved Sebastian Sallow, and I could not let him go.

Was it a little crazy? Perhaps. Was it too soon? Perhaps not. I had known the man for nine years, give or take the five in which we never spoke to one another. Still, that was plenty of time to develop love for a person.

But would I tell him? That was a strong no.

My magic, my memories and my temper needed work. Sebastian and I desperately needed to find some semblance of peace before we started throwing around the l-word. I could only hope he felt the same about the pace of our relationship.

Our arrival at the Sallow Estate late Friday afternoon only affirmed how cruel the last five years had been. The hedges were unkempt, Anne's gardens were full of weeds and dead, dry overgrowth. The windows were dark and dusty. The Sallow home lacked the light and life that I remembered.

It seemed Anne had taken the light with her.

"Do you still live here?" I asked, almost rhetorically, as I crossed the threshold into the dark, deserted house. We both lit our wands and headed down the hallway toward the back of the house, lighting the sconces along the way. It looked entirely unchanged from the last time I had seen it, on the day of the funeral.

"Not really," he shrugged. "I suffer through the summers here; I stay at Hogwarts as long as I can. I could never sell it, though. Too many memories.," he said wistfully. "I still have dreams of raising my family here, someday."

We had arrived in the parlor, where his parents' armchairs sat vacant by the fireplace. Sebastian shook his head as he lit and tended the fire. "I- I'm sorry, that was a strange thing to say."

"What's strange?" I asked, strolling past him and taking a seat on the sofa. It was the only piece of furniture in the room not covered in dust and books. I rubbed my hands together as I waited for the warmth of the fire to reach me. "It's beautiful that you would want to raise a family here, Seb."

He kept a respectable distance between us when he joined me on the sofa, as if he had not been inside me just five days earlier. 

I imagined it was everything since the Pensieve that was keeping him somewhat distant all afternoon. I had screamed at him, thrown things at him, then abandoned him for days to try to solve Rose's troubles without him. My lack of communication had left him to think that I had ended things between us.