Under Your Scars || Sebastian Sallow x MC

Chapter 43 - The Devil I Know

There's no going back

If I get trapped

I'll never heal

My monsters are real

Monsters

-Shinedown

____________

Sebastian POV

"CALLAN!"

I bolted upright, screaming as I shifted from dreams into reality. My chest heaved with ragged breaths, my fists clutched the armrests of the chair I found myself sitting in. Something tumbled out of my lap and to the floor with a muted thud.

My clothes clung uncomfortably to my body, aided by the layer of sweat I was covered in. I grasped my shirt collar and gave it an aggressive tug, ripping the buttons clean off and sending them flying to all corners of the room. I didn't care. I was suffocating.

I needed air.

I took a moment to find my bearings, focusing on my surroundings. I lurched forward, staring at the floorboards until I could feel them beneath my feet. 

"Shit," I mumbled as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and sweat from my forehead. "Fell asleep again."

I was at my desk back in the faculty tower, though I had no recollection of how I got there. All I remembered were glimpses of the most recent and vivid nightmare of the week.

I was chasing Callan through Hogwarts, of all places. I tried calling for him to wait, slow down, but my voice was gone. Or perhaps he couldn't hear me. I followed him to the room I now know as the Map Chamber, down a spiral staircase and into some immense cave system under the school. There was an explosion... then it was too late.

Cal drowned in a pool of his own blood, and I could do nothing but watch the light leave his eyes.

Again.

With great effort, I rolled my neck to the right to see what had fallen.

My borrowed copy of Magical Oddities and Anomalies lay crumpled on the floor. My gaze drifted upward, scanning the bookcase until it landed on the bottle glinting in the dim candlelight of the room. The essence of Juliette's eyes was still sealed inside, untouched.

How did that get there?

Last I recalled, it was well-hidden it the back of a desk drawer. It was an old comfort, a long-lost friend, slowly creeping its way back into my life. Nothing like the way Juliette had come in like a monsoon just a few months earlier, sweeping me up in her tempest until there was nothing left of me.

Every shred of love I had left to give, I had poured into her. Not that I was resentful. She could keep it all, take it all with her as she left Hogwarts to do bigger and greater things with her life.

I shouldn't have allowed my thoughts to drift to Juliette, but I couldn't help it every time I saw the color of her eyes in that damned bottle. I reached across the small chasm and pulled the bottle into my arms, cradling it like it was my firstborn child.

It was ironic how a gift meant to serve as a respite from the stresses of the teaching profession could potentially fuel my demise. Still...

Maybe it was time.