Under Your Scars || Sebastian Sallow x MC

Chapter 36 - The Bleeding : Part 1

It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me 
I toss and turn like the sea

If You Only Knew

-Shinedown

____________

Juliette POV

I waited for Sebastian to turn around, to come back, to fight with me. 

But he never did.

I stared daggers at his eagle tattoo as he disappeared into the darkened stairwell. I silently apologized to Callan for his Animagus getting caught in the crossfire of my fury toward his surviving partner. The sound of his footsteps eventually faded and he commanded the floo to return him to the faculty tower.

I snatched my wand from the nightstand once I knew he was gone. I desperately needed to let my magic out. It was surging into my rings, becoming so painful that I had to ball my fists to contain it.

Hm. I'm containing it. That's new.

I could not even enjoy the small victory because I was being slammed in the chest by the familiar first waves of a panic attack. The walls were closing in and my hands felt as if they were on fire.

I stormed up the stairs, my thundering footsteps echoing throughout the room. I conjured a dozen practice dummies in the atrium, knowing I had more magic to release than ever before. My wand fell to the floor and I held my trembling hands out in front of me. The rings were not even silver any more, but glowing white on my fingers as if they were made entirely of magic. I would be in awe if I was not reminded that it was Sebastian who had given them to me, and he was the reason I had so much pent-up magic in the first place.

"EXOLVO... POTESTATEM!" I screamed through the tears, surprised to have found my voice at all.

He invaded my privacy.

"EXOLVO POTESTATEM!"

He invaded my memories.

"EXOLVO POTESTATEM!"

I needed him, and he abandoned me.

One by one I blasted the dummies into oblivion, amounting to nothing more than small piles of blackened ash on the stone floor. I found a morbid satisfaction in the destruction, despite imagining Sebastian's bloody handsome face on every single one. Or perhaps that was what made it so satisfying.

I used the next few dummies to try my hand at releasing magic from the rings without the incantation. I had been honing my nonverbal casting for as many spells as I could since the incident. I would never again allow myself to be rendered useless and defenseless by some fucking rope and a silencing charm. The rings could be the most powerful weapon of all in a crisis. 

Thanks, Sebastian. 

It took some doing, but I was able to release small bursts of magic from the rings nonverbally with some success. It was all for the better, as the lump in my throat was making it difficult to repeat Sebastian's incantation.

I wanted to spare him from the worst of it.