-"This isn't real, you're not real."
-"I am. Believe the truth, believe me. Open your eyes and look around. This is real, I am real. WE are real."
- "W-we...won't...last forever. We can't..."
- "We will be together, forever." "You're my destiny."
...
As the day wore on, Nandini found herself lost in thoughts, thinking about the days she has passed away.
2022 Hauz Khas, South Delhi, India. 4:37 pm.
locking herself up in her bedroom, Nandini's eyes desperately searched for a shape, square, circle....anything. anything to focus on. She kept taking deep breaths, nothing worked. She told herself, "This will pass away. I will be fine." still nothing worked. she felt her hands trembling, her full body shaking. she sat down on the floor, leaning against her bed, hugging her knees. She asked herself between her heavy breaths, "Should I cry?" She repeated the question until her eyes shimmered with unshed tears and she broke down fully. She sobbed quietly, resting her head on her knees. she was afraid, someone might hear her crying, and she will have to give answers. what will she say? That she's afraid, the person who's outside, in her living room, talking and smiling with her parents, might touch her again. That person might try to take her advantage again. That person....his eyes, his presence itself makes her freak out.
After some moments of crying, she crawled up on her bed. Reaching out to the nightstand, she opened her phone, searching for someone special's lives. Her hands trembled as she connected her earphones with the phone as she played the old live video.
Her favorite pillow, now soaked by her tears, was tightly hugged by her as she listened to the live stream. That soothing voice made her feel safe, made her want to keep fighting. She's his fighter, his angel. Even if he doesn't know her, she is. She closed her eyes. Her tears kept streaming down as she whispered before drifting off, "I miss you."
.
.
7:48 pm.
Nandini blinked open her eyes, waking up from her deep slumber. Her phone was still clutched in her hands, close to her heart. She sniffled and sat up on the bed, looking around. It was already evening. She got up from bed and went to get fresh in her bathroom. After spilling water on her face, she looked at the mirror, at her reflection. Her eyes were still red from crying. She spilled water on her face again, specially on her eyes. As she walked out of the bathroom, she picked up her towel, drying her face with one hand and reaching for her phone with the other. she stopped when she saw a notification in her phone, her eyes widening in surprise. It was from weverse, an app for k-pop fans. The notification was from Jimin's id. He was live, 2 hours ago. A small smile appeared on her lips slowly. she quickly clicked on the notification, assuring herself that he was live, he had showed up, finally. Entering the BTS community, she saw he had posted.
"I miss you."
Her eyes shimmered with tears again as she looked at his post with a soft smile. She scrolled down, opening his live stream that had ended just two hours ago, when she was fast asleep. curled up on her bed, hugging her pillow, listening to one of his old live streams. Her face lit up with a brilliant smile when she saw his face through her phone. Smiling at her, talking about his plans.
she walked to her balcony, closing her eyes and savoring the fragrance of her favorite flower in the cold evening breeze as she clutched her phone once again, holding it close to her heart.
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a soft smile played on her lips as she whispered to herself,
"Do you really hear my thoughts or this is just another coincidence?"
Her question was already answered long ago.
"All this is no coincidence Just, just, by my feeling The whole world is different from yesterday Just, just, with your joy"
