First Tour

Chapter 36

Previously in First Tour

"Why'd you try to kill yourself, Sarah," Harry said. "I-I. I c-couldn't take the p-pressure. I j-just want this to all e-end," I said. Harry let go of my shoulders and whispered something to Niall. Niall took my hand and said, "Come on, Sarah. Let's go clean your wrist up." Niall closed the door and helped me up onto the counter of the sink. I hear Harry whisper, "I don't know what to do with her anymore."
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Sarah's P.O.V.
"Give me your wrist," Niall says taking the rubbing alcohol. "No. That's gonna hurt like hell," I say holding my wrist closer to me. "Sarah, it's suppose to help clean it out. If I don't put this on it, it'll get infected. I don't want you do get sick because you didn't let me clean it out," Niall says putting some of the rubbing alcohol on a piece of cloth. I put my wrist out and Niall grabs above the cut. "Damn, Sarah. Why do you make these things so deep?" he says cleaning up some of the blood. He puts pressure on it and I wince. "So I can forget about my worries," I say. "Well, this is gonna hurt. Do you want me to get one of the lads in here?" Niall says. I nod my head. Niall pokes his head out the door and says, "Will one of you come in here and help me? This cut is deep and I need someone to keep her calm when I put the rubbing alcohol on it." "Yea, of course," I hear Zayn say. Niall walks in front of me as Zayn closes the door behind him. Zayn puts his arm around me as I put my head in his chest. "This is gonna hurt," Niall says. I feel a cold cloth go onto my wrist then a seizing pain. I scream in pain. The cloth is lifted off my wrist as Zayn says, "it's over now." I lift my head off of Zayn chest and look at Niall. "Now was that so bad?" He asks. "No, it was peachie. Yes, it was bad! Did you not just hear me scream like I was being killed?!" I say. "Well, it's over now. Thanks, Zayn," Niall says. "No problem," Zayn says walking out of the bathroom. Niall takes a gauze and puts it on my wrist. He then wraps it.

"Thanks, Ni," I say hoping off the counter, with his help of course. "No problem," he says smiling. "No really, thank you. Without you I probably would be dead," I say stopping him from opening the door. "Why in the world would you be dead? You have the rest of the boys in your life," Niall says frowning confused. "Because you're a huge part of my life. You keep me going. You bring me up when I'm down. I don't think you know how much you mean to me. I know this is all cheesy but it's all true," I say. "I know, you mean the world to me. You don't know how scared I get everytime you do this to yourself. And everytime you try to kill yourself, I feel like I failed you. I feel like I failed you by not being there ever since Trevor started bullying you. And I hate myself for not asking you out sooner so you wouldn't have to go through what you went through with Alvin," Niall says all in one breathe. I didn't know I was doing this to him every time I do this I think to myself. I end up hugging him with my head on his chest and his chin on top of my head. "I'm sorry for putting you through all of that, but thank you for putting up with me. Not many people can stand me and my drama," I say. "It's okay. And no problem," Niall says. He pulls away and grabs my good hand. He leads me out of the bathroom.

As soon as we step out of the bathroom, Niall and I see the rest of the boys talking to Paul, who has some kind of pill bottles. "Thank you so much, Paul," Louis says. "Your welcome," Paul says. Paul gives Harry the pill bottles and walks out. "Um, lads. Please say you four aren't drug addicts," Niall says walking towards them. "No we're not drug addicts. These are actually for Sarah," Liam says. "Say what now?" I say beyond confused. Harry walks up to me and hands me the pill bottles. "Depression pills? The fuck is this for?" I say. "You have to take two a day and they help you from killing yourself," Harry says. "I don't need these, Harry!" I scream throwing the pills on the ground. "Yes, Sarah, you do! This is my last resort! It's either this or therapy! The therapist is even gonna tell you to take these!" he screams back. "Well, I'd rather go to therapy then take these damn pills!" I scream. I'm about to open the door to my room when all the boys shout at once, "we don't want to lose you!" I take my hand off the door knob and turn around. Niall has the pills in his hand. "Listen, Sarah. I've known you since you were 2 months old. I know when your just being a tough guy or not. And your being a tough guy. I can tell that you want to take the pills but you're think about what the haters will say if you do take them," Louis says. "Do you remember what you said earlier, Sarah?" Niall asks. I nod and he continues, "well, this is the first step in proving it." I let out a huge sigh and stomp over to the boys. Niall has his hand out with the pill bottles and I snatch then out of his hand. "I'll take them tomorrow," I say walking back over to Niall's and my room. "Oh no you don't. You're taking those now," Harry says running over to me and stopping me. "I'll. Take. Them. To. Mor. Row," I say opening the door. Harry slams the door closed with his hand. "Now," Harry says. "No," I say. "Yes." "No." "Yes." "No." "Just take the damn pills!" Louis shouts. "Fine!" I shout. I storm into the kitchen with the boys trailing behind me. "Why are you following me?" I ask them. "So we can make sure you take them and not just throw them down the drain," Zayn says. I roll my eyes as I open the cabinet that has the glasses in it. I fill the glass up with water until it's half full then take two pills out of one of the bottles. I put the two pills in my mouth then wash it down with the glass of water. I put the glass in the sink and say, "happy, Styles." "Very," he says. I roll my eyes and storm off to my room. I slam the door behind me. I go face first on to the bed and scream into the pillow. Thank god the pillow muffled the sound because it was like Bloody Mary, at least I thought.