To Hold Tight or to Let Go

Chapter Twenty-Six

Kongpob stirred as the sun filtered through their new bedroom. He stretched slowly then immediately turned and cuddled against Arthit. Waking up every morning with Arthit's scent in his nose was the best thing he could ever ask for. He pressed a kiss to Arthit's cheek.

"No," Arthit grumbled. "W-want to s-sleep."

"You have all your therapies today P'Arthit. It's time to wake up. You need a good breakfast and to take your meds." Kongpob kissed him some more until Arthit finally woke up. He let Arthit sit in bed while he walked around the room to get Arthit's clothes out for the day. He didn't miss the way Arthit watched him longingly. Kongpob knew that look well. In fact, he wanted to give Arthit what he wanted but Kongpob had to hold back. He thought things could go back to semi normal and they could make love but there was still so much that Arthit couldn't do yet. Knowing his man, Kongpob knew that if Arthit felt incapable when they made love it would put him in a depressive mood. Kongpob didn't want Arthit to be thrown into anything that would sadden him so Kongpob decided it was best to wait things out. He technically wasn't lying when he told Arthit they should wait until he heals up more.

"K-Kong," Arthit called him gently.

"Yes?"

"I'm h-hard," Arthit said bluntly.

Kongpob looked at him and sighed. "P," he groaned. "I told you that we should wait." Arthit didn't reply. He just rested his head back against the headboard and then a minute later he was moving the sheets and scooting himself out of bed.

"P, what are you—" Kongpob was silenced by Arthit walking wobbly to his wheelchair. He sat down then wheeled himself to where Kongpob laid out his clothes and used his arm to gather the clothes and put it in his lap. Then he was wheeling himself out of the bedroom and towards the bathroom.

"Is this you throwing a tantrum P?" Kongpob asked amused. "You do realize that you can't shower by yourself right? How will you ever be—" Arthit entered the bathroom and slammed the door shut. Kongpob only smiled and shook his head, knowing Arthit would eventually call for him but his smile slowly slipped when his P didn't call for him after two minutes. Instead, their door knocked and when Kongpob opened it, his mother was there.

"Arthit asked me to come bathe him," she said.

Kongpob felt irritated immediately.

"No mae, I'll do it," Kongpob said.

"I asked him why not let you do it he says he doesn't want you to touch him. I have to respect his wishes baby boy. We both do."

"Alright fine. If he wants to throw a tantrum fine by me. I'm gonna go shower in another bathroom." He went to grab his things then left the quarters so he could shower in the bathroom in his old bedroom.

By the time Kongpob was finished and back in the bedroom, Arthit was dressed and sitting around the dining table with breakfast. His mom clearly set things out for the both of them. Kongpob sat down and started eating his breakfast. Arthit just glared at him.

"What?" Kongpob asked him.

"C-can y-you h-help me e-eat p-please?" Arthit asked calmly.

"No." Kongpob said. "Eat yourself or call my mae to do it."

Arthit nodded and looked at the spoon. He reached for it with shaky fingers and tried to spoon up some rice. When his hands wouldn't comply he tried to cut into the omelet but that was also unsuccessful. Getting frustrated at his lack of progress he threw down the spoon then wheeled himself back to the bedroom. Kongpob didn't miss the tears streaking Arthit's face as he wheeled away. He hadn't taken his meds yet so no doubt he was emotionally unregulated. Kongpob didn't care though. Arthit was the one that wanted to play this game first so Kongpob was only playing along. He stayed out living area watching TV while Arthit was in the bedroom. Nearly an hour later, Ohm was knocking rapidly on the door that lead outside from their quarters. Kongpob answered and Ohm pushed him aside and immediately went to the bedroom to see Arthit. He spent five minutes there before he came out of the room and grabbed Arthit's unfinished breakfast and went back to the room. Curious, Kongpob went to the room and saw Ohm helping Arthit to sit up and then beginning to feed him. Arthit was crying again as he let Ohm feed him.