Thirty-Nine

205 6 5
                                        

Song: Achilles- Gang of Youths

AN: oh my god. What have I done 🫣

 What have I done 🫣

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The Dreamer


I kept my distance. That's all that saved me from crashing out on everyone else around me.

How could she choose to make herself vulnerable to his games again? What could possibly posses her to make such terrible decisions. I could protect her just the same as Mal. I was 'two-for-O' against my enemies. I could handle my shit much better than almighty Malachi.

I took that pain like a motherfucking champ for him. And all I got was a fucking participation trophy. What a fucking joke.

"You really got to get whatever this is under control, Levi," I heard Sam's voice sigh from behind me. "You're only hurting your chances with her, ya know."

"And he hasn't," I shot. "You of all people should be furious."

"That's between me and him. I'm not making my shit everybody else's problem right now," Sam said plainly. "The cold shoulder doesn't look good on you, Levi."

A bitter laugh tore from my lips. "Yea? Well I don't give a shit. What do you want?"

Sam loosed a heavy breath. "She asked to see you."

I clicked my tongue. "Did she now," I muttered.

"What is your fucking problem, mate? She wants you. Go to her—"

"My problem is the fact she opened herself up for his betrayal. Again," I snapped.

"So what? If you're really worried about her safety then you should be there next to her. Keep an eye out, not bitch about it," Sam laughed in frustration.

I bared my teeth, rage grinding them hard.

"Fuck off, Sam. I don't think I can stomach anyone else taking his side—"

"Side? Who the fuck said I was picking sides? I came here for you! I came here because you should know she hasn't given up on you. Even now. Even when you've treated her like shit because you think you're the only one entitled to her," he hissed. "What the fuck happened when you went under? You were not this bitter before."

"Whatever. Message received. Feel free to leave me the fuck alone," I muttered.

I felt his disappointment from where I sat on a plain plasticky chair in the corner of my solitary living quarters. Maybe it was guilt that clawed at my throat.

Maybe I didn't understand this either. These thoughts had always been there. But I had always been able to see reason.

Until now.

Until my whole chest felt like just an empty cavity.

"Ok," Sam said quietly. "I'll just... leave then."

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