𝑬𝒓𝒆𝒔 𝑴í𝒂 | ᴮᵒʸ ᴹᵉᵉᵗˢ ᵂᵒʳˡᵈ

51: Pig Parents

"Guys," Shawn said as he turned the corner. "Guys, guys, guys. Do you remember that goldfish I used to have?"

"The turtle?" Cory replied. "Yeah, well, I finally replaced him." Shawn said.

"With what?" I asked. "Here, boy!" He exclaimed down the hall. What answered his call wasn't what I expected. It was a little baby pig.

"What do you think?" Shawn asked as he leaned down to pet it. "Wow. I'd hate to have to flush him down the toilet." Cory answered.

"It's a pig." Shawn told us proudly. "You know, something... It is a pig." Cory said as he leaned down to pet it. "Wow. He's cute."

"Where in the world did you get a pig?" I asked. "After I left your trailer last night, I went digging around in the sludge where my house used to be, and I found this little guy gnawing on my uncle Sal's old peg leg." He answered.

"Then how does Sal get around without it?" I questioned. "Who said anything about "without it"? Sal was there. He just never noticed the pig." Shawn said.

Cory let out a light chuckle as he stood up. "Shawn, I see what's going on. I'm spending way too much time with Topanga, and this is your oh-so-subtle way of showing me that I can be replaced by a common pig." He said.

"Come on, Cory," Shawn said as he stood up. "As flattered as you are, this piglet has nothing to do with you." The bell rung, and Shawn went to pick up the pig.

"Oh, come on, Little Cory." He said as the pig squealed. "Time for class." "Little Cory?" I questioned. "Hey, it was the first name that popped into my head."

"Oh, he's so adorable." Topanga said as she walked over and petted the pig. "What's your name, cute fella?" "His name's Little Cory." Topanga looked between Cory and the pig. "I can see that." She said.

"Where'd you get him?" "I found him." "Well, we have to find a nice home for Little Cory." "He has one... with me." "No, I mean a proper home where he can run around." "He can run around with me." Shawn said.

"Come on, Shawn. Do you really know how to raise a pig?" "Topanga, it sounds like you're trying to tell me what to do." "Well, it sounds like someone should." "Guys, guys, lighten up." Cory said.

"I mean, any way you slice it, it's only a pig, right?" We stood slightly shocked and taken back by Cory's words. "What?" He asked.

♥

"You know, having a pig is sure making school fun." Shawn said. "But the fun is over. Look who's coming." Cory replied, gesturing to Mr. Feeny. "Uh-oh... Feeny." Shawn muttered.

The pig squealed and walked away towards the lockers, entering into Shawn's locker through the little door he made. "You taught him that?" I questioned. "No, he just knows." Shawn replied. We walked towards the lockers, and Shawn stood in front of the little door.

"Hello, principal Feeny," Cory greeted. "No farm animals here." He and Shawn let out a chuckle.

"Yes, well... the day is young." Mr. Feeny replied before walking away, confused. "No farm animals here?" I questioned. "I panicked, okay?" Cory replied.

Shawn opened his locker and crouched down. Cory and I mimicked his actions. "Okay, Little Cory, it's about time you meet the family." He said.

"This is Cory. He's your uncle." "I'm not his uncle. I'm his funcle. Get it? It's when you mix fun and uncle together!" Cory said. "You're also named after him for... obvious reasons." The pig oinked.

"And this is Adriana-Camila. She's technically your mom, but we're not currently together, so you get to see her on weekends." "Why do I get weekends? Why can't you have them?" I asked. "Because I have full custody." "Why can't we have joint custody?" "Because I said so." "I'm getting a lawyer." "With what money?" I turned to the pig. "I'm gonna kidnap you."