Jill's POV
{ gonna give my via creds to Tumblr ❤️ }
••• 2 weeks later •••
"Jill, I know you love Hayes." Rachel says as her tears hit the pillows.
"I don't know if I do," I say, sighing and sitting down on the bed. "I feel like I'm using Shawn. But, I really like him. B-But, do I love Hayes?"
"How do you do it?" She asked. "How do you pretend that seeing him with someone else doesn't take another shard of your fragile, glass heart every time?"
I watch as her mascara falls down her face as little droplets hit her pillow. Seeing her like this shatters my heart. Just as I thought she would stop talking, she continued on, taking deep breathes.
"Because I don't think I can do it," she cries. "I can't pretend I don't wrap myself around my pillow at night to muffle the tears of a broken soul and I can't silence my eyes when my heart breaks in them every time I meet his crystal blue eyes."
"The trick," I replied, "is to keep breathing. The trick is to not let your breath halt even though your heart skips a beat when you see him. The trick is to not gasp for air any time he smiles and the trick is to not miss a step when they let their gentle, dangerous fingertips linger on another's hand for a beat longer than necessary. You just keep walking and breathing and walking and breathing and, one day, your heart won't skip a beat and you won't feel the urge to cry whenever he looks at someone else. You'll just keep on breathing."
"I love him, Jill," she says, crying more. "He was my world. He made me way happier than any other boyfriend I ever had."
"E-Even Cameron?" I say.
"Even Cameron." She says, whispering back and staring at the wall.
"I'll be right back." I say, wiping the tears that fell down between our little conversation.
I walk out of the house, but my dad grabs my arm.
"Where are you going? And why is your sister crying!?"
I yank my arm back from him. "I'm going where ever I want to go and I don't know, you are never home so maybe you should ask her."
Before he could respond, I ran out of the house over to the Grier's. Chad answers. I put my hands in my pockets of my sweatshirt.
"Oh hello, Jill."
"Umm, hi." I say back.
"Are you here to see the boys?"
"Actually just here for Nash. Sorry." I say.
"No worries. There is other days to see Sky and Hayes. But, Nash hasn't left his room. Do you know why? I hear cries up there all the time and all he does is lock the door." Chad says, with worries in his eyes.
I step inside the house. "Rachel and him kind of broke up. Mind if I go talk to him?"
"Oh. Yes, go right ahead." Chad says.
I reply with a 'thank you' and run up the stairs. Only being greeted by Skylynn.
"Jill!"
"Hey, baby girl." I say, picking her up.
"Wanna play barbies? Nash won't play with me."
"Awe, I wish I could. But, I need to talk to Nash. Maybe another day though?"
She nods and I set her down as she runs off. Just as I was about to turn the other way to Nash's room, Hayes sees me.
"Jill! I didn't know you were coming over?"
