Jill's POV
I woke up in my own bed. Finally out of the hospital. I'm so glad to be out of there. Hospitals always make me sad and nervous. But anyways, I woke up with an actual smile on my face since 5 months ago. It was real, I swear it was. Because the smile wouldn't leave my face and I think I wonder why...
"Wake up, it's snowing!" Hayes says, jumping on my bed.
I wouldn't budge. I dug my head under the covers and watched in ease as Hayes was trying to get me out of the covers. He lifts the covers over and I'm immediately taken by the coldness of the room. Hayes head was so close to mine, I can almost hear him breathing.
"You have no idea how bad I wanna kiss you right now." Hayes says, whispering and inching closer to me.
"Hayes," I say, whispering.
He traces his hand across my cheek and lays down next to mine.
"You're so beautiful, Jill."
"Thank you, Hayes," I say, "I thought we were going to go play in the snow?"
"We will. I just wanna talk to you." Hayes says, whispering.
"Okay. What do you wanna talk about?" I ask.
"You have no idea how bad I want you to be mine." Hayes says, whispering slightly.
I just look at him. I don't say anything. I do nothing but stare.
"But you can't be mine." Hayes says, shaking his head.
I watch as a tear comes down his cheek. Is he being for real now? This boy has hurt me down to my very bones and now he saying he wants me one minute and changes his mind the next.
"Why not?" I ask him, snapping.
"Can we talk about this later?" He asks, facing me.
I grab his face to where he is actually looking at me.
"I wanna talk about it now." I say.
He nods, "Jill, I'm moving."
"That's a good thing, right?" I ask.
"Out of North Carolina. My dad got a good job that would be good for out future and good for Magcon."
I look at him and tears start to roll down my face.
"I'm coming with you, right?" I ask looking at him, "Right?!"
He shakes his head and looks at the ground.
"What about us?" I ask, with a crack in my voice.
"I don't know," he says, whispering, "I don't wanna leave. I don't wanna leave you. It's just like how Nash has to leave Rachel. I tried talking my mom out of it. I even tried my dad. Nothing worked. I'm so sorry, Jill."
I stand up and put my hands on my head.
"I can't believe I fell for you so hard you didn't catch me and now you are moving and I don't know what to think." I say.
"I'm always going to catch you, Jill."
"Not when you are many miles away, Hayes! I love you so damn much. It's not even funny." I say, looking him in the eye as tears rolled down.
"Leaving you is the hardest thing I'm ever going to have to do. But think of the future, Jill! Once my life gets settled we can be tog-"
"Don't. Don't say we'll be together again in the future. No. I can't wait for you that long. I need to live my life. You made me feel so fucking special, Hayes. I'm not waiting for you." I state.
"What are you saying?" Hayes asks me, with a crack in his voice.
"In life we make the hardest choices," I say, looking at Hayes, "but what I'm saying is.. Hayes, you need to let me go."
I couldn't even react because Hayes' lips were already crashed to mine.
"Why did you do that?!?" I ask him.
He shrugs, "because I love you."
"I can't believe you just did that, Hayes." I say, putting my hand on my head.
"What's the big deal?" Hayes asks.
"Because I'm gonna fall in love with you all over again.." I say.
"Jill, you are going to meet a boy one day in your life. And as much as I want it to be me, it can't. You're going to catch that boys gaze and it's going to tell you to run as fast as you can in the opposite direction. But you're not going to listen because he'll put his arm around you and his lips will beg you to drop the fences around your heart. His eyes, my god, they are going to scream at you that he breaks people who where their heart on their sleeves but you're not going to care because he's running his fingertips through your hair and whispering promises of forever into your ear. If you look closely, his eyes will betray memories of the girls before you, the girls that didn't make it out of his embrace alive. But you're going to turn your head and walk away. Because you don't wanna get hurt." Hayes says.
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying I know what people are like. If anything, I don't want you to be the one getting hurt."
"This is gonna be so hard for me, Hayes. I have to move back in with my actual family I haven't talked to in months. They probably don't love me. My parents could be married for all I know and I wasn't at the wedding!" I say.
"You think they don't love you?"
"I don't think, I know." I say, crossing my arms.
"Who wouldn't love you, honestly? What is not to love about you?" Hayes asks me.
"I don't even wanna talk right now," I say, sighing.
"I leave," Hayes says, "in 2 weeks time."
