Jill's POV
••• 1 week later •••
I woke up quite early. In fact, I don't even know why I woke up this early. I never wake up this early. I just don't feel the same. I don't feel like the old me. And I knew it had a big part of Hayes being gone. I just knew it. Everybody knows it. Even Elizabeth is starting to realize it and she's starting to ask me questions. I just keep on telling her, 'it's just that time of the month' or 'I get homesick'. And she believes it. I can't hold those kind of excuses forever. Especially for more months.
I think I'm starting to realize that I can't live without Hayes. My sister is in the room right next to mine and I swear she hears my soft cries going from midnight to dawn repeat. How am I gonna live when I end up sometimes crying myself to sleep? And sometimes tears won't come out, so, I think of every possible thing I've done wrong in my life till I finally fall asleep.
I tied my shoes and slipped on my Nike shorts and t-shirt. I tied my hair in a pony tail. I opened the door to get out of my room, but Rachel was right there.
"You're up early," I say, softly.
"I am. Your point is?"
"You miss him. Nash." I say.
"More than anything in the world," she says, walking into my room and shutting the door.
I follow after her as we guide to my bed and sit down.
"I think you and I are broken, Jill." Rachel says, softly.
"Why do you say that?" I ask, whispering.
"There's a house I have to drive by everyday on my way to work. And recently, someone new bought this house and fixed it up all nice and put in a brand new, bright yellow door. And the place looked happy, you know? It's like the kind place your favorite aunt lives and she always makes you eat second portions of dinner and gives you cookies after," She pauses and shivers a bit, despite that the air conditioner is not on. "But that doesn't change the fact that a man killed his wife there 9 years ago. It doesn't change the fact that for 7 years there was a sign with the words 'RIP AUNT' plasted on the window. It doesn't change the fact because that is the place the neighborhood goes around telling horror stories about.. I-I think broken people are the same way... You can dry your tears and hide the bags under your eyes with concealer. You can brush the couple of days worth of tangles in your hair and put a smile on your face. This neighborhood wouldn't notice a thing. They are too busy staring at the girl always smiling. But once they see you are broken.. They'll never unsee it."
"I don't think I'm broken," I said, softly.
A soft laugh comes out of Rachel's mouth, "I said the same thing till it was me laying in bed with tears in my eyes missing him."
"I miss Hayes like you miss Nash, but it's only been a week."
"A week can feel like a lifetime when you are missing the person you love." Rachel says, stating the facts.
"You're right," I say.
"They'll be back. I know they will." Rachel says.
"I know they'll be back too." I say.
"No, don't you get it? They are famous. We just had to hopelessly fall in love with the Grier boys."
"You are saying it like its a bad thing." I say.
"Jill, they are going to travel the world and leave us one day. And we sure as hell won't be ready for it. It will come around and bash us around leaving us in a confused state of mind."
