My Diary

August 9th, 2025

Dear Diary,

Yup, it's been basically forever we know. And we just published an entry from 2023 that we forgot about, oops.

A lot has happened. So let's begin.

First off, I have tattoos. In fact I am getting a new one tomorrow and touching up one that took forever to heal. I might show them, I might not. They are very... I get recognized for my tattoos often and if anyone on here meets me in person I don't want to be recognized because of them.

I get SSI (Social Security Income). I got approved about 2 or 3 years ago, I don't remember when exactly. I got it on the basis of my mental health. I have a history of long unpredictable hospital trips and I have to have all of my appointments in person. A job analyst person said with my medical problems and mental health I wouldn't be able to maintain a job as a copy person, someone who just prints things and gives them to people. That was... Humiliating to hear.

I am back in college and going for a business degree. I am taking a semester break because I have an unknown health problem that causes me severe pain. Originally it was thought to be an ovarian cyst or ovarian cancer but it's not. So I have to go see some specialist about it to figure out the problem.

I am no longer living with my aunt. She became extremely abusive as soon as I got my SSI got approved. Everything but physically abusive unfortunately. I had to go to a DV Shelter for 6 months before I got my apartment. I mainly got help because she threatened my cat Koa and that broke me.

I found out that I have really bad eyesight. As in damage to my corneas because I never got glasses as a kid. I basically went blind when I was in the shelter out of nowhere. I ended up seeing an optometrist and found out that I could use two prescriptions for glasses because of how bad my eyes are. Not fun.

I also found out that I am SEVERELY allergic to dust. That was a not so fun night at the shelter. Out of nowhere I had hives and had to be stabbed with my epi pen at like 8 pm one night. I have a peanut and bee allergy that was already documented so I had an epi pen on me, at the shelter I had to keep my epi pen on me at all times because of those two allergies. I saw an allergist about three weeks after because it took that long for my hives to go away. I am allergic to several types of grass along with dogs (I am slowly finding out what kinds). But dust is my most severe reaction was dust. My dust hive was double the size of the control hive.

With my allergy I can't clean. It would end with me in the hospital. I have to get a dehumidifier and air purifier for my safety. I can't be in the same room as the dusting is happening. And if ceiling fans are turned on AFTER I am the room I can't breathe and have to be closely monitored so I don't get worse. This allergy has made my life hard. I love dusting and cleaning. I can react at any time and I have to constantly look at my arms and legs for hives. I have to tell everyone who I meet that I have an epi pen in my black purse and how to use it. It's in the magnetic pouch of my purse which is in the front of the purse along with my inhaler.

For my apartment let's do a quick talk about it. It's not that big but not that small. The bathroom is super small. I can shave my leg while using the toilet and brush my teeth all at the same time. My oven is older than my mom and is a gas stove and oven. I can use the stove top comfortably but the oven part I am scared to use because I can't tell what the temperature is. My living room is also my dinning room and it's the largest room in my apartment. Koa gets a dedicated closet for her cat box because I have two closets. My bedroom is kinda weird shaped. There is a wall that juts into the bedroom making me have to have my bed against the wall next to my living room. It also has an outlet that spat sparks at me so I won't be using that one. And the bedroom has one door even though it has two doorways. The apartment has grown on me in the past year. On the 20th of this month it will be a year since I moved in.

I have 2 boyfriends and 2 girlfriends. One of my girlfriends has a son who I adore. I met her at college in my math class. We connected quickly after I threatened to throw my shoe at someone else in the class. She was shocked by my statement and it actually helped her focus on the class and me. We asked each other out. I am glad that I met her. And one of my boyfriends has a matching tattoo with me.

But, we are safe. We are also tired and hungry. So we are going to call it here.

Sincerely,
The Snow System