Autumn is a second spring

136. Night at hospital 3

"I am sorry," Ohm went on. "For making you uncomfortable. I know you have been avoiding me. I didn't say anything because I hoped maybe you would change your mind. Stupid, right?"

Fluke's voice was quiet when he finally spoke. "You didn't make me uncomfortable, Phi." He paused, then added, "You and I... we weren't so different as kids. I didn't have my parents around either. They gave me everything—money, gifts—but were never had their presence. They had always been too busy to be raising a child. I knew they loved me but not enough make me their first priority. I practically grew up on my own just like you. I was told to be strong, to smile no matter what. So I learned to pretend. To act like nothing hurt, so that it would make things easier for the people to be around me."

He stared down at his hands, his voice trembling slightly. "And then you came along. For the first time, I could stop pretending. You used to cook for me, surprise me with the dumbest little things, and somehow... it made everything feel okay. You were the only person I could really be myself around. You were my safe place." He looked up, meeting Ohm's gaze. "You were the best boyfriend I could have asked for. Those three years with you were the happiest I have ever been."

Ohm's voice cracked. "Then why did you break up with me?"

Fluke looked away again, his jaw tightening. "Because all good things end, Phi. Ours did too." He forced a breath. "Things changed so fast. I wasn't in a place to live or love the way I wanted anymore. After Earth and P' Kao's wedding, I am leaving Thailand. Probably for good."

Ohm's eyes widened. "Then... let me come with you," he said quietly, desperately.

Fluke shook his head. His voice was steady but heavy with sadness. "It's better if we go our separate ways. If we ever cross paths again, let's pretend that we are just some strangers."

Ohm's eyes burned. He bit his lip hard to keep from sobbing, but the tears still came. They fell silently, tracing lines down his cheeks. "I shouldn't have forced this talk on you," he said hoarsely. "After all, I am the one who forgot, not you."

Fluke's heart twisted painfully. Ohm was right. He remembered everything—the laughter, the fights, the late-night talks, the quiet mornings. Being around Ohm brought all of it flooding back, and it hurt more than anything. He wanted to  be held by him, to tell him he still loved him, but he couldn't. Not anymore. The cost of that love was too high.

He stayed silent, pushing the storm of emotion down, until he saw his secretary approaching from the café entrance. It was time to end this. He stood and said quietly, "You should go home, Phi. Get some rest. There is no need for everyone to stay here. You can come back in the morning."

Ohm nodded, not arguing. He knew there wasn't much reason for him to stay. Sammy was practically a stranger now, and his bond with Boston had never been close as of his memory. He followed Fluke toward the elevator where Net joined them.

Just as the elevator doors opened, another man stepped out—Kao's secretary. Fluke frowned. "P' Sound? What are you doing here?"

"Khun Kao sent me," S replied. "He asked me to take Khun Ohm home."

Fluke hesitated, then nodded. Of course Kao would do that, probably worried after what had happened at the concert. He turned to Net. "You can go home too."

Net nodded and stepped back. Fluke, Ohm, and Sound entered the elevator. They rode in silence until the doors opened again on the maternity floor. Fluke stepped out while the others continued down to the parking lot.

As soon as the doors closed, Fluke's composure cracked. He walked quickly down the hallway, glancing around until he found the nearest restroom. He slipped inside, locked the door, and hung a maintenance sign outside. The moment the latch clicked, his knees gave way.

He leaned against the door, trembling, and the tears came fast—ugly, raw sobs that he couldn't stop. The sound of his own crying filled the small room, bouncing off the tiles. He hated himself for it. Hated that he had to keep letting go of the things he loved most, that he couldn't hold on to Ohm even when every part of him wanted to.

He pressed a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. His chest hurt. His throat burned. His face was wet with tears and snot, and he could barely breathe. He had spent years learning how to hide his pain, how to keep smiling no matter what. But here, alone, he couldn't pretend anymore.

When he finally stopped, he felt drained—empty in a way that scared him. He sat on the floor for a while, leaning back against the door, staring blankly at the ceiling. His phone buzzed beside him, startling him out of the silence. A text from Earth lit up the screen: Sammy's being taken to the labour room. Come over.

Fluke took a shaky breath and got to his feet. He walked to the sink, stared at his reflection. His face was a mess—red eyes, tear-streaked cheeks, hair out of place. A version of himself he could never let anyone else see. He splashed cold water on his face, rinsing away the evidence. When he looked up again, his expression was calm, composed, the familiar mask back in place. He straightened his clothes, fixed his hair, and unlocked the door, remembering to remove the maintenance sign before stepping out.

The waiting area outside the labour room was quiet except for the low hum of machines. Earth was sitting there, scrolling through his phone. When he saw Fluke, he stood up quickly. "Sammy is doing well," he said. "She has dilated enough, and they have taken her in. P' Ton was allowed in with her."

Fluke nodded. "Where is P' Kao? Wasn't he supposed to come with you."

"He went to pick up Sammy's parents. Their flight just landed."

Fluke hummed in acknowledgment and started toward the chairs. Earth frowned, studying him. "Are you okay? You look like you cried."

Fluke shook his head lightly. "Just the cold wind. I was out there for a while. My eyes started watering."

Earth didn't look convinced but didn't press. "Have you seen Prem and P' Boun? I heard they were coming too."

"They are in my room," Fluke said, sitting down in the corner seat. "Bew is with them."

Earth grinned. "In the same room? Really?"

Fluke sighed. "Don't get any ideas. They are just sharing space."

Earth chuckled but let it go. The two sat in silence after that. Fluke leaned back against the chair, staring blankly at the floor. His face was calm again, but inside, he still felt like that boy crying behind a locked door—tired, broken, and wishing things could have been different.