i will follow you into the dark

comforting words

yaaaassss... sana po magustuhan niyo bagong update... : )


Mika's POV

It's been two weeks and still no signs of Ara. Honestly It is frightful. I don't know what to do, i don't know what to say and i don't even know how to act. I really hate it when things are getting out of my control.

This is all new to me, it is my first time getting infatuated and the worst thing is i was in love with a girl. Well i've had girl crushes before but i never thought of getting into relationship with the same gender. Not until i met Ara. She made me feel that everything in this world is possible as long as you have the purest intentions. She made me feel that we are possible, that we can be together, but her text message was bothering me. There's a lot of questions running in my hear but she wanted space and time and that's what i'm giving her. I never communicated with her since then and it is killing me. I miss her so much.

I am at a pastry shop because i am meeting Cienne, she is my childhood friend. I needed someone to talk to who knows me too well to get some worthy advice. Well actually i just really needed someone to keep me sane because this longing that i am feeling right now is driving me crazy.

Cienne: HI Miks, I'm so sorry i was late. Traffic eh lam mo na!!! She hugged me and pulled a chair so she can sit beside me.

Mika: Ok lang, lage ka namang late eh. Nagorder ka na?

Cienne: to naman at least i came right? OO nagorder nako bago pumunta dito so What's up?

I looked at her and i don't know how to start. I can't find the right words to explain how devastated i am so i just decided to hug her.

Cienne: Awwwww, i missed you bestfriend. So tell me what's wrong?

This is what i love about Cienne, she always initiate with hard conversations.

Mika: I am so confused cienne, I don't know how should i act.

Cienne thanked the waiter who served her order while raising her brows to me.

Cienne: Ok, I'm also getting confused and i don't know what to tell you kung ganyan ka kagulo mag kuwento. Ano ba talagang nangyare?

Mika: I've met someone and everything went so fast. I think I'm in love Cienne. I cupped my face.

Cienne: Well what's there to worry about? You're already 19 Miks and I think it's about time for you to explore the magical world of love. Who is he?

MY heart skipped a beat. I took a sip from my drink.

Mika: Actually, It's a she. I'm inlove with a girl besty.

I was so afraid to check her reaction. She held my hands.

Cienne: Miks, are you gay? since when?

I looked straight into her eyes and i don't see any signs of disgust or judgement and that makes me happy.

Mika: I'm not sure Cienne, all i know is when i met Ara, my world flipped. I thought i'm straight but i guess i'm not because i wouldn't be deeply in love with her if i am right? I just know that deep in my heart that Ara is the one that i wanna spend the rest of my life with.

Cienne smiled at me.

Cienne: Well, i'm so happy that you were able to find someone to love but Miks the path you take will never be easy. We live in a world full of criticisms and judgements. I'm just afraid that you will not be ready.

Mika: I already thought about it for a million times. I know that it will be a bumpy road but as long as i am with Ara. I know that I will be strong to face any struggles, my love will give me the courage to fight for her, to fight for our relationship. Losing her is what i fear the most.

Cienne: As your best friend, you know that i will always be here for you. I will support you on whatever path you will take. Basta wag moko liligawan huh? She laughed so hard

Mika: Haha ewwww, grabe ka...Taken na puso ko...Walang ibang laman to kundi si Ara lang. kaso kinakabahan ako Cienne.

Cienne: Saan naman? If you're sure about your feelings for her what's there to be nervous about?

Mika: She never failed to make me feel that i'm the only girl that she sees but last week, she sent me a text message saying that she will be gone for a week to settle personal issues and since then i never see her around the school premises. She always sends me take outs for lunch to assure that i am eating and even sent girls to serenade me but it's been more than a week now and im afraid that she already changed her mind. I'm dying thinking that next time i see her that she don't love me anymore.

Cienne hugged me tightly when she noticed that my tears are starting to fall.

Mika: You're thinking too much Miks, if you really love her then you need to trust her. I guess the best thing that you need to do right now is to give her the time and space that she wants and if ever well i hope not but if ever she had a change of heart, then there's nothing that we can do about it. All you can do is to accept her decision and move on with your life and if that happens you know that i will always be here. I'll serve as your girlfriend oh diba sosyal... hahaha

I'm really happy that i have Cienne today. I really enjoyed being enclosed in her comforting arms. Her advices made me clear my mind. My heart just crumbles thinking that there is really a possibility that Ara will no longer come back to me and i need to be strong  i just need to trust Ara. I am still hoping and praying that she will still come back. I'm wishing that when i see her again it will still be the same Ara that i fell inlove with.