First Words

Chapter 18

Tony's POV|| what da fuq

I know I don't talk to Kellin much at all but when he woke this morning, it was like it wasn't him. Like he wasn't listening to anyone, he wasn't moving, his eyes were fixated into the carpet. like he was in airplane mode. Doing nothing. He looked so far from reality. He was sat on the couch like this for almost two while hours. Even when food was placed in front of him, he didn't even blink. It was honestly creeping me out and I was getting kinda worried for him.

I wasn't the only one to notice either. "Tony, kitchen now." Mike demanded. I got up but Kellin didn't even notice, and walked into the kitchen with Mike. "Whats up?" I questioned. "Kellin. He is acting so weirdly and is so distant with everyone. Vic is getting worried and frustrated. We need to get him to snap out of it." With that said, I walked back into the lounge and sat beside Kellin again. He didn't even flinch. I put my hand on his shoulder and said "Kellin you okay? You seem so far out of it." He looked up and nodded. In his eyes, there was a different saying. His eyes were a faded colour and his skin was so white, he might as well be Snow White humself. it's was just so crazy. And in that one moment of looking at him, just showed he isn't in the real world.

He looked away and back at the carpet again. Honestly, the light that once surrounded him since we brought him home has now vanished. Again. It's amazin how someone has a glow of their feelings and stuff circling them but no one else can see it. Heck, when I first noticed this, I freaked. Like its so unexpected to have this kind of gift and it's comes really handy in stick situations. Much like this one. However, I just really want the happy-go-lucky Kellin back. he was so bubbly and could hardly wait to see anyone but now. Now he's like a robot. No emotions, no light and no nothing. Hope thrown out the window.

Kellin's POV||

When I awoke this morning, I felt completely numb. All I wanted to do was die. That dream was just too much for me this time. I didn't want to do anything, I didn't want to be touched or talked to. I just really wanted to be alone but I highly doubt that Vic or Jaime would let me. Vic has been to boyfriend like to me. he cuddles with me, kisses me, sleeps with me and just all the other relationship shît. Whereas Hime has been like a father figure to me. He watches out for me, has my back 24/7, understands me and is tree when I need him. Those to guys are the best people I have ever had in my life.

I got out from the bed and threw on some random clothes. Then, to the bathroom to pee and brush my teeth. And I began to walk down the stairs but before that, I went back into the bedroom for a jacket. Once I made my way to the couch, I huddled up. Not really watching my surroundings.

I knew someone sat beside me but I dot know who. I knew everyone was trying to grab my attention but I wasn't listening. I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realise that everyone stopped trying to grab my attention, back to them. Fuckîng attention seekers. Ha thats funny. Not. However, someone grabbed my arm and I looked at them. Not knowing who it was or what they were saying but I just nodded anyways. I looked back at the ground and continue on with my little stare out with the carpet. God, I'm pathetic. Someone put their hand on my knee and I flipped the fuck out. My eyes grew wide with tears and my head was furiously shaking in a no attempt. The began thrashing around and breathing really heavily.

Once the twat removed their hand, I calmed down but kept my heavy breathing. I tried to focus on who it was but I couldn't. I got so frustrated that I stood up and stormed the hell out of that room. My legs took me somewhere but I don't really know. I kept moving, tryig to focus further. I came to a stop and say that I was in the clearing of the forest. It was beautiful. The trees softly blowing in the wind, the leaves dancing around, the little lake running smoothly and the air clear. I sat beside the lake and watched the little tiny ripples and the small fish that appeared once in a while. I honestly would rather die here than in an abusive home with a rapist of a father. I wonder what my dad is doing now? Is he missing me? Does he regret what he did? Did he find someone else? Is he passed out drunk? Like what is he doing and whats going threw his mind right this minute? I guess I'll just never know.

I knew that a few tears escaped because they dropped into my lap. Tears are such a weird thing. Like their salty but it doesn't really hurt your eyes. The come from a random little tear duck and completely fill your eyes. They blind you for a while an so many can come from that one small spot. also it's weird how your eyes show so much emotion but you can hide it through a fake smile and actions but your eyes hold so much depression, pain, hurt, sadness and gloomy feeling. they do a darkish colour when our angry or when you're happy they shine so much. Life is weird.

Jaime sat beside me and looked out into the horizon. "You know, we don't want anything or anyone to hurt you. We want you safe kellin. You're out little cub. And if anything is troubling you, talk to us. We want you to know that we are always here for you. Nothing can hurt you with us around." And that speak killed me. "Thank you Jaime. I really appreciated it." I smiled at him. He turned his face towards me with huge eyes. "No way." "Yes way." He was talking about the speaking thing. He looked at me one last time before engulfing me into a hug. A very tight hug. I hugged him back because this was really nice to have. "So are you talking to the others or just me?" He asked. "I've already been speaking with Vic so I might as well talk to the guys. No point in them staying in the dark." Hime just nodded.

Jaime's POV||

When Kellin walked out Vic tried to follow but both me and Mike told him to stay and give Kellin some space. "But I don't want him alone you guys! He could get hurt or taken!" Vic spoke. "We know but, fuck, Vic he needs some space for a while bro!" Mike yelled back. Oh no. "And how the fuck so you fucking know!? You aren't him Mike!" Now it's a yelling war. A Fuentes yelling war is never good. "Yes! Calm down! Vic, Mike is right but Mike lay off Vic for a while!" A now Tony.

I walked out the door in-noticed and went to find Kellin. I looked at the hill, the park, the black roses then the forest. When I got to the clearing I saw black hair swaying in the wind. I was the first to break the silence, obviously. "You know, we don't want anything or anyone to hurt you. We want you safe kellin. You're out little cub. And if anything is troubling you, talk to us. We want you to know that we are always here for you. Nothing can hurt you with us around." He smiled then spoke to me! For the first fucking time! "Thank you Jaime. I really appreciate it." My eyes were practically hanging from my eye sockets. "No way." "Yes way." He muck know what I was talking about. I pulled him into a hug for a while. "So are you talking to the others or just me?" He didn't take his time with his answer. "I've already been speaking with Vic so I might as well talk to the guys. No point in them staying in the dark." Nodding, I stood up, holding my hand out for Kellin and we walked back to the den in silence. I just can't believe that he spoke. It's so amazing and wow. I'm still in shock on the inside. We got to the door and Kellin was the first to speak. "Sorry I freaked. And sorry for being all weird and shit."

The bomb has just been dropped...