Xx Chapter 7: Old Habits xX

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I leaned into his kiss, smiling when he pulled away. "There's your reminder," I lightly laughed, leaning me head onto his chest. He snaked his hands around my waist pulling me in for a hug when his mother rounded the corner. "You two are so cute," Ashton blushed, letting go of me and taking a step back. HE reached for my hand to take my with him but I placed my hand out to stop him. "I'm going to help with the dishes." He nodded smiling and walked backwards disappearing around the corner.

"You don't have to do that," I looked at Anne and smiled. "I want to," You started cleaning the dishes, but your mind kept wandering. Ash's lips fit perfectly with yours, and when you two are together everything seems... perfect. Anne interrupted your thoughts," Thank you," I looked at her and shook your head, "It really isn't a big dea-," She placed a hand on mine, interrupting me. "I don't mean for the dishes, I mean thank you for being there for Ashton, for coming into his life. I thought I was going to lose him again."

You heard the sadness in her voice, she was truly worried, "It's just, when he came back from tour he was so reserved, he only went out with the boys and even then Luke told me he was awfully quiet," She sighed, leaning on the counter, "I just didn't want to lose him." You processed what she was meaning, she was afraid he would start cutting again.

"Anne," You breathed quietly, tugging on the sleeves of your shirt slightly, "I promise, he will never fall into old habits," I bit my lip, thinking how serious the situation actually was. "I know you will," She places a hand on my, rubbing it slightly, "Now you go, I'll finish, you need to keep those boys in check." I smiled and made my way out of the kitchen, listening for the boys voices. I rounded the corned to the hallway when I finally heard them.

"I don't know about that Ash, you know what Michael said," Luke had a hint of concern in his voice. "Yes, Luke, I do know what he said, and it's unfortunate that I have to break that rule." I stopped outside Ashton's bedroom, listening into their conversation, don't judge me. "Okay," Calum's voice was even shakier then Lukes, almost like he was afraid. "Are you at least going to ask him first?" I backed away from the door, still listening as I reached the end of the hall. "I don't really know."

"Boys?" I called, pretending like I was looking for them. Calum's head popped out of the door first. "In here, Miss Clifford," I rolled my eyes, approaching the door. I stepped inside and stepped over Luke, who was laying on his back in the middle of the floor, which is really inconvenient to step over. I made my way over to the bed, sitting down next to Ashton and crossing my legs. All three of them we looking at me, no actually it felt like they were starring at me. "What?" Ashton coughed nervously, breaking the other two out of where ever they were. "So, Michael's coming home soon."

I furrowed my brows at Luke, that is a pretty drastic subject change, what are they hiding? "Hey, you know what I want to do?" Ashton said, pulling me onto his lap. Calum said something under his breath causing Luke to punch him in the arm and Ashton to turn a bright shade of pink. "I t-think, we should play 'Truth or Dare," Luke and Calum nodded in approval and looked at me to see if I agreed as well. I bit my lip looking between Luke and Calum who were smiling mischievously. "Why the hell not," Ashton tighten his grip around my waist and placed his chin on my shoulder.

"I want to ask first!" Calum practically yell, causing me to jump. "Ivy, truth or dare," Not that I don't trust Calum, I just don't know how scandalous his dares are. "Truth," Calum pouted playfully, "Fine, okay, who's your favorite in the band?," I smiled to myself, seeing at what they were getting at. They aren't even good at hiding it. "Oh, definitely Luke," I rolled my eyes and looked at the register of shock on every ones faces, including Lukes',"Oh my god, guys I'm just kidding," Relief spread across all their faces, making me laugh. "It's Michael, because he's my brother," Luke and Calum grimaced and Ashton let out shakey breath.

We played for about another hour or so, before I started drifting off to sleep. Ashton positioned himself to where I was laying more on his chest. "You really are lucky man," Calum said, just before slumber over took my mind.

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I woke up with Ashtons' are tightly around me. Luke and Calum were asleep on the floor right onto of each other, and Michael was leaning against the wall, looking at his phone. Wait, Michael? "MIKEY!" I yelled, making Ashton jump and hold me tightly, Calum and Luke scream and hug each other. "Ivy!" He yelled back, mocking me. Ashton released me, letting jump into Michaels arms. "I missed you!" He hugged me tightly.

"I know kiddo," I grimaced releasing him, and backing away, "I'm not a kid," I sat back down, leaning into Ashton's arms. Michael gave Ashton a look that could shoot daggers, but Ash didn't seemed to notice. "Boys! Ivy! Breakfasts ready!" Anne yelled through the house. I hopped off of Ashton and landed softly on my feet.

I started to make my way out when Ashton behind me when I heard Michael, "Hey, Ash, lets talk for a minute." I looked back at Ash, him locking eyes with me for only a second. The door closed and Luke, Calum, and I were left outside. Luke gave me a reassuring smile and nodded towards the dinning room.

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We finished breakfast and Michael and Ashton still hadn't left. At this point you could hear Michael yelling and Ashton slightly raise his voice. Luke and Calum had joined them a while ago so I was sitting in the living room listening to them. "Hell fucking no!" Michael was yelling again. I pulled my knees into my chest and bit my lip, trying to stop myself from crying. Anne went out with Harry and Lauren when the yelling started, so I was sitting alone.

"Ashton, you'll just fucking make it worse!" I heard something crash and let out a whimper. I couldn't stop the water that was welling up in my eyes anymore. "Michael!," Both Luke and Calum yelled out. I stood up, shakily making my way out the house. Once I was outside I started to run, getting as far away as I possibly could from that.

I ended up standing in front of my house, opening the door. My mom wasn't home yet which was good considering the act I was about to do. I ran up with stairs to my room, looking at my dresser for my special black box. Where the hell was it? My hands started shaking as I threw things off of my dresser. I let out a shaky breath and look around for something else anything. I made my way downstairs running into the kitchen.

I searched through all the drawers looking for anything sharp that I could use. My eyes set on a knife that was set up in a holder on the counter. I reached up, pulling one out and looking at the sharpness of the blade. I sighed making my way back up the stairs to my room and shut myself in my bathroom, sitting on the floor next to the bath tub. I placed the blade to my skin, letting out a shaky breath.

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(A/N) Oh em geezers, I am literally crying right now. I can't help it! This makes me so sad, don't do it IVY!!! Anyways, more to come soon lovelies! Don't forget to <3/comment/follow/ and SHARE, because sharing is caring (oops sorry cheesy ik) so see y'all soon!!

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