The Consequences

CHAPTER 27

*MICKYEL ANGELA ROSALES P.O.V

Everything is crushing down. My life, my plan and my family. Yeah, a family. Napaka-ingrata ko kung sasabihin kong hindi ko nakikita ang hinaharap ko kasama si Ge at Georgina. Isa lang naman ang gusto ko eh, ang mabigyan ng pamilya ang anak ko. Yung masaya, buo, kumpleto at puno ng pagmamahal. Gusto ko ng magsimula ng panibago, handa na kong harapin ang mga bagay bagay but i guess its another test of hope, love and faith.

Gusto ko lang naman na iparamdam sakin ni Ge lahat ng sakit na nadulot ko sa buong taong pag iwas ko, sa pagnakaw ng oras na dapat kasama nya ang anak namin at ang pagpatay ko sa magiging anak namin. I want to free myself from guilt at alam ko magagawa ko lang yon kung ipapamukha nya lahat ng mali at kasalanan ko. I been very selfish for all these years pero bakit ganon? I can't see anger in his eyes. Pakiramdam ko lalo akong pinapatay non sa paninisi.

Hindi naman kami aabot sa gantong punto kung sinabi ko kay Ge sa simula palang ang nangyari samin at ang nararamdaman ko. I wish I was brave enough to face all those consequences back then.

But I guess I'm too late. Everything happens because of me but I'm still a coward to face those consequences.

"Hey pretty woman, alone?" A guy approach me and seat in the stool beside me. I look at him uhhhhmm he's okay. Yeah just okay because he's a dumb for asking me if I'm alone, isn't obvious. After kong umalis I rode a taxi ng walang direksyong pupuntahan napilitan lang akong bumaba dahil paikot ikot na kami. Im wearing a jeans and white off shoulder top paired with pink flats.

"Being hard to get huh?"he commented again

"Can you just leave me alone bastard." I said without even looking at him.

The alcohol hits me pero I still want to stay. Wala akong mapuntahan, even my friends dahil alam kong madali akong mahahanap ni Gerald kung dun ako pupunta. Yun ay kung hahanapin nya pa kO at gusto nya pa kong makita. Gusto ko lang makapag-isip. Baliw na nga ata ako eh. Dahil umaasa akong tatanggapin at patatawarin nya ko sa lahat ng kasalanan ko pero ito ako at dinadagdagan na naman ang mga pagkakamali ko. Im a coward, I know. I'm afraid to lose what I have pero hinahayaan ko namang mawala.

I remember when I was a child my parents are not always there and having a big age gap to kuya Milo is frustrating. They are so busy to make everyone's proud without having anyone by my side. Malapit kami ni kuya at mas lalo pa kaming naging malapit sa isat-isa nang dumating si ate Bel and work as my nanny pero dahil din sa kanya naramdaman ko na nahahati na ang atensyon sa amin ni kuya. He gives pririority to her than me so I learned to be a brat. I rebelled by having a boyfriend at sixteen which is Gelo. I have loved him dahil naramdaman kong special ako sa kanya pero ang gago kasi ng bestfriend ko para hindi nya maramdaman na mahal ko siya. I dont know how I end up being with Gelo. Ang alam ko kasi mahal ko si Gerald but siguro dahil narin sa magkaibang pag-trato I guess I'm inlove with the fact that his brother gives more attention to me than my family.

I stand up ayoko pang umalis kaya sasayaw nalang muna ako. I start swaying my hips when i felt the pain in my belly and everything flashback. Ayoko na this is not the right place for me. When I was about to turn someone grab my arm and grind on me,buti nalang at tagiliran ko yung natamaan nya.

"Ano ba let go of me. Pervert!!!" I almost shout dahil sa lakas ng music. I keep on struggling pero ayaw nya parin akong bitawan

"Oh come on babe don't be too hard on yourself. I know you want it too." He's the same guy on the bar counter. I slapped him pero mahina lang dahil kontrolado nya yung braso ko.

"Ano ba sabi ng bitawan mo ko eh!!!" I keep on struggling kahit kumikirot na yung tahi ko.

"Jonathan!!"a girl behind my back shouted. And I thanked that girl dahil unti-unting lumuwag ang kapit ng lalaki sakin pero hindi nya pa rin ako binibitiwan.