Among Us (boyxboy) [ON HOLD]

Chapter 34 - The weight I carry

Sam had insisted a lot on her point that in the end, being honest about one's feelings would always be the best way to go. She'd told me to always tell the truth when in doubt and be upfront about any situation. I had almost felt a bit intimidated by how adamant she'd been about that. But now, walking back home from my own personal cupcake hell, I couldn't help but feel thankful to her.

While the advice she'd given me had been fairly obvious to me, it'd been nice to hear it from someone else. She'd urged me to do what I'd wanted to do anyway. And it helped. In a way, I was strangely grateful to have followed her to that weird cafe.

Walking down the road, I was so immersed in my thoughts, trying to come up with a way to tell my parents what had been going on, that by the time I saw the little group of people coming my way, I barely managed to lift my hand in greeting and say a small "Hi".

I didn't know all of them, but two of the five people I used to sometimes have lunch or sit with in uni. We weren't friends, but maybe good acquaintances.

Both of them looked at me, looked me dead in the eyes, but nothing spoke of recognition in their faces as they shrugged, two other girls giggling at silly old me greeting people that didn't know me. Then they walked past and continued on with their conversation as if I'd never even caught their eye.

I stood there, dumbfounded. During the last months, heck, the last year I hadn't really interacted with people that much, but still, to not be remembered by people I'd considered something close to friends was harsh.

I stared down the street, where they'd come from and I'd walk towards, thinking of how far away I had drifted.

Even before the incident, I'd never been much of a social person. I'd had people to talk to during uni, eat with or even sometimes go shopping with after school if necessary. Other than that, yes, I admit I barely hung out with anyone, but this was too much. Apparently, I wasn't even worth missing when gone.

I on the other hand, had missed it. Maybe not specifically them for who they were, but the times we spent laughing over senseless stuff and even though we never declared each other friends, we were still a small group of people, put together through the same lectures, and it worked.

When I had been recovering I had missed those times, I had missed just being able to walk up to them and casually pat them on their shoulder, to get the courage to talk to them. At the beginning, when I had gone back to uni, I couldn't even be close to them because my irrational fear wouldn't let me. Now, there was no getting back what I'd so unwillingly lost.

After closing my eyes for a few seconds, I decided to accept it as it was. There was no space on my shoulders to add another weight. So I walked home and forced a smile on my face. Not for anyone else to be convinced by, but for me, to prove that I could do it would I choose to.

Neither of my parents were home when I returned. I wasn't surprised. My lecture was on for another twenty minutes so they wouldn't expect me home earlier than the next hour.

I settled in the kitchen after putting all of my stuff away and just sat there waiting.

Citty was my priority now, I had decided. I would tell them about her disappearance, just to have it off my chest and to have them to talk to. Not talking to my parents about anything had also been a regular occurrence recently. And I couldn't continue this way. I wanted our former relationship back and maybe this was my chance.

When the front door opened I tried to relax, but my heart beat far too fast.

"Duncan? What are you doing here? You're really early." Mom commented when she saw me sitting there. Dad was right behind her; she'd probably picked him up on her way back.