I'll Reach For You (GirlXGirl)

14. Breaking down

The sound of tiny feet causes me to wake. I know Hunter is trying to be as quiet as a mouse when she is up at night. But I can always hear her, her small feet walking down the stairs. Yeah, I have noticed that her shoes are so small and her hands are so little as well.

I get out of bed and start walking down to her. Hunter sits on the couch just staring out in the air. I take a step towards her and she turns to look at me. I can see the sweat on her forehead and her eyes are red. She looks shaken up. I sit down next to her.

"You okay?" She nods, but I know she is not telling me the truth. She looks so goddamn tired and drained. It hurts to look at her. She struggled with sleep for a while now, usually, I go back to bed after hearing her walking around. But sometimes I go down, now Hunter looks worse and I am worried.

"Hunter you can tell you know." She shakes her head and looks at me with a fake smile.

"Okay, then you don't need to tell me." I say smiling. She laughs and it makes me smile even brighter.

"Do dad know you walk around in the middle of the night?" I ask curiously. She breathes out.

"He knows all of my problems, so yes." She sounds a little better, but I still see the tiredness. Then a thought comes to my head.

"You can't sleep, because of nightmares right?" She looks caught off guard, and now she has frozen again. I face palm myself. Why can't I think before I open up my stupid mouth? She looks lost, her eyes widen and she is not moving.

"Hunter?" I lay my hand on her back, her shirt is damp; she makes me so worried when she is in this state. It's like she is trapped in her thoughts and she is struggling to find the way out.

"Hunter?" I say her name again and take her hand. She is so warm. I wish I could make everything in her head that is bad to just, fade away. She shakes her head getting out of it.

"Sorry." She stands up and itches her neck. I move up next to her.

"No, Hunter it's my fault. I should have kept my mouth shut." She shakes her head of my words.

"No, you're right, I can't sleep." Now she looks and sounds upset.

"I can't sleep, because I dream. Dream about stuff that I cannot get out of my head," I watch her talking, and the look in her eyes screams of pain. Tears streaming down her cheeks.

"They just won't go away. I do not know how to make them go away." Without thinking, which I always do, I wrap my arms around her holding her tight and bury my face in her shoulder. I breathe her in and smell her wonderful scent. I know she doesn't like to be touched, but I know she needs it right now.

"I-I" She says, struggling to breathe.

"It's okay Hunter." Then she put her arms around me as well and I can feel the warmth of her arms through my shirt. Her face hidden between my shoulder and neck, as she tries to get herself together. I can feel her tears go through my shirt, but I do not care. Her arms around me tighten.

"I'm sorry." She says.

"It's okay." I promise her.

"No, it's not. I can't sleep and I am so tired." She admits to me and it hurts in my heart to know that she is struggling.

"Let's watch a movie, last time we did it, you slept." She moves out of my arms looking at me with her soaking wet face. She dries the tears away and nods. I smile.

We decided to watch her favorite movie. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it. Hunter fell asleep with her head on my shoulder, after an hour. The movie just ended, and I reach for the remote to the edge of the couch.

It causes Hunter to fall into my lap, strange enough she didn't wake. I breathe out in relief. She moves her hand and lay it on my thigh, sending chills through my body. I am only wearing shorts and her warm hand on my skin gives me weird feelings in my stomach.

I am so glad she fell asleep; she looked so upset and frustrated when she cried. It was like she wanted to give up, she kind of did when she broke down in front of me. For her, she probably felt vulnerable and embarrassed, but for me it made me feel more drawn to her.

I want to help her and make her agony go away, even though I do not know how. But I got her to finally sleep, that is some kind of victory and progress. I lean my head back and close my eyes. The sound of Hunter's breathing makes me drift to sleep.